A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I don't know what to do, I need advice and guidance.Ever since I was 14, I knew I was bi, I had a sort of relationship with a girl before hand, and since then had a brief relationship with a guy. I say brief, we got intimate sexuall, not actual sex, but oral and stuff. I'd look forward to it every time, but after every time I'd regret it. Before I'd be like, really excited playing it out in my head, then afterwards, I was like, "oh no what have a i done" sort of thing, theres still a lot of innocense inside of me.I'm now 18, and now another guy is chatting me up. He keeps inviting me round to his house, for sex and so far I've declined. Sometime's I'll be really looking forward to it, and wanting to go, and planning it with him, but then, a bit later, I feel scared and like, oh no, I don't actually want to do it.It sounds weird, but ejaculation is like an on off switch for my feelings. As soon as I ejaculate, all the sexual urge evaporates and I'm left with regret, and I don't understand why I was feeling attracted to it at all.I've never had this problem with girls however. I never regret it and it feels right.
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male
reader, Welsh Uncle Dave +, writes (24 May 2011):
It seems you favour girls over guys given what you've said.
There is obvious an interest in guys but it's either your mind telling you it would rather be with girls or a psychological thing making you think what you're doing with blokes is bad.
Whatever it is, you should only do what you want to do.
Any sexual activity is meant to be fun and not regrettable.
Answer these scenarios to yourself:
If a naked bloke and a naked woman were stood in front of you:-
a) just looking, which would get you more turned on?
b) if one could perform oral on you, which one?
c) if you could perform oral on them, which one?
d) if you could have sex with just one of them, which one?
e) if you had to choose one to date and the other for fun with, which would it be?
See what you come up with?
A
male
reader, Boonridge McPhalify +, writes (24 May 2011):
 if you cannot cope with societies judgement and have guilt free sex with a man then dont do it.
i tend to feel guilty after having sex with someone i didn't fancy but was really horny and felt my judgement was off. its basically your brains way of saying "bad move".
ussually its because the person i had sex with was in some way repulsive/offputting but i did it anyway because i wanted someone to cum on and have a poor ability to inhibit my desire for instant gratification.
maybe you are really horny but after sex you realise its not what you wanted.
stick to girls then...
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A
male
reader, jp23  +, writes (24 May 2011):
 maybe you just favor girls over guys. Maybe you should stick with sleeping with girls. I mean why sleep with a guy if your just going to feel awefull after wards, if you like a guy or love him then you shouldn't have that type of emotion afterwards.
If I do have regret sleeping with a guy its usually after everything is over, because I regretted being with that person. Not the sex so much but how the person treated me, kinda kicking my self saying why not sooner lol.
with you though; its strange, you shouldnt try to be with a guy. If you have sex with a guy; it may mess you up further emotionally. Your good with girls, and you have no issues with them. Stay with someone you feel comfortable with, before/during/and after sex too.
Dont do something thats going to hurt you personally. it may work for the next guy, but don't put your self in that posision. If any one ask do you like guys say yeah, but I am more comfortable with girls. why put your self in a place to get hurt with a guy? Stick with your feelings, don't void them out and get more hurt. I would stick with the girls if I were you.
Just because something feels good; doesn't mean thats going to be for them. Your mind is rejecting guys, maybe your straight more so than bi? Its telling you, no I didn't like this and lets not do this again.
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