A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I have been seeing my bf for about 8 months. We have a strong relationship i think, and stay with each other 5-6 nights a week.My hairdresser and him hooked up a few times before him and i met. She is best friends with his ex girlfriend. They were starting to make seeing eachother more frequent until i came into his life and he completely stopped all contact with her.He is a jealous man himself, and doesnt like my ex texting me, and writes things back from my phone - sometimes without even me knowing.My hairdresser asked me to organise for my bf to come down to her salon so she could use him as a model for advertisement purposes. He agreed to do this, and i had no problem with it. She did his hair the other night, at her salon - i wasnt invited, either to the photoshoot this weekend either.I found a text on his phone last night from her, the day he got his hair done, it said "Great I'll see you soon sweet, xx" he had replied "okay :)"I feel disrespected by her, because i thought we were friends, i am jealous and annoyed.I havent spoken to my bf about this yet, because i hate fighting with him.Im not sure whether i should approach her or him or both and how?!He also commented to me that her and him were the only two at the salon that night - and she had put on heaps of weight. And he makes jokes to me because i did express to him i was jealous i couldnt go too. "im only doing it because its free" he said, but he is now going to book in again for regular haircuts..
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female
reader, Teacake  +, writes (21 November 2008):
 Maybe he is just trying to make you jealous? This does sound like typical bitch behavior on her part if she knows he has a girlfriend. Its a tough call. Some women have a natural way to keep their man in line and draw boundaries so that other women will not even try to get near them.
Somehow see about going with him so that she sees who is in control of the situation. Don't act shy or as if you are intruding on them, act as if you are his woman and she is just a hairdresser. Don't let your jealousies show or anger. Its not easy. I don't know how to do that and I lost my man to a higly skilled manipulator who didn't even want him for anything more than getting him to want her, because she loved very much showing me who had power over him.
If he doesn't want you along, drop him. He is playing a dangerous game with your mind.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (21 November 2008): First off, i am very sorry! That seems really stressful. . . In my opinion you should talk to him, the relationship is between you and him not you and your hairdresser. Just be very open, and very honest. But be careful what you say to him. Make sure not to accuse or blame or point fingers. Use "i think" and "i feel" to start alot of your sentences. There is an obvious lack of trust in your relationship, and this will either make or break you. I hope this helped!
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