A
female
 ,
*atzkitten
writes:Oh god i have no idea how to word this. but ill try my best. ioneof my previouse questions wasa bout a lad showing his sister some of the texts i sent him. well recently i found out he didnt show her she took his fone but thats another story. Theres this girl he really likes and he asked her out yesterday (infront ov me which i thought was a lil mean but...) shes another one of his sisters friends and we were hanging around togeter yesterday. she asked to look at my fone so i passed her it forgetting that i hadnt deleted the texts he sent me. she read one off them and i wouldnt show her the rest, i only showed her the ones where hes saying nice tings bout her and stuff. i told her thats all he'd sent. but now hes mad at me for letting her see them cos he ses he really likes her and i've f***ed things up. i've sed sorry and tried to explain but hes still mad at me. i can understand why hes mad but why wont he listen when i try to explain? and what can i do to make it up to him??? please help i feel awful!
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reader, anonymous, writes (14 August 2006): Good to hear. Time and space as well as a sincere apology win again. *wink*
A
female
reader, katzkitten +, writes (14 August 2006):
katzkitten is verified as being by the original poster of the question Its all good poeple! hes sort ov friends wit me nw!!! im happy agen lol. thank you all x x x
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A
female
reader, katzkitten +, writes (9 August 2006):
katzkitten is verified as being by the original poster of the questionim sorry but you are wrong, she is my friend as we have been best mates since primary school!
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A
male
reader, Wild Thaing  +, writes (9 August 2006):
 There appears to be a lot of "he said, she said" going on here. And that's where the trouble begins.
First, you've learned that using text or email to engage in personal conversations is risky, especially if unkind words are spoken. The target of these words could see them and then there will be explaining to do. That's not what happened here but your friend has concocted that worst-case scenario in his mind. In the future, you may want to ditch the texting when conversations get personal and actually have a real and confidential conversation.
Second, don't believe third parties - always get verification directly from the source. Your friend's sister is not your friend, and has an agenda that may include malicious mischief towards you.
Finally, you've learned that your friend's reaction to the situation reveals some problems in his own life. If he were a kindred spirit he will come to his senses, speak to you respectfully, and apologize for his behaviour. If he isn't one, then you are better off putting your energy and compassion towards someone who is worthy of your friendship.
Good luck and take care.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (8 August 2006): Well, it may not have been clear that he didn't want you to show her and that he said those things to you as a confidant.
Learn from this and next time just tell her if she has any questions about him that she should go directly to him and ask them herself. Guys like confident women.
Also apologize to the girl and say that you feel bad that you betrayed his trust and eventhough she may not understand, one day you hope she will.
Apologize profusely to your guy bud. Tell him to forgive you and that you have learnt from this. Tell him that you will not repeat the incident again. Keep that promise.
This will blow over. You have learnt your lesson. Life is much too short to harbour ill feelings over a misunderstanding.
Intentions have led to the confusion and misunderstanding.
*hugs*
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A
female
reader, katzkitten +, writes (8 August 2006):
katzkitten is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you both. he is sooo mad at me. he says he doesnt want anything to do with me. im not too upset but ive known him so long and i see him alot. hes one of my friends. i dont think i can be bothered with him anymore. i emailed him explaining and he mailed me back sayin i chat s**t and he doesnt want anything to do with me. theres a long story behind some of it but his sister led me to belive he new she red the texts and i sed that well she saw yours and i sed that he knew that he said he didnt but im sure he did. hes not worth it...but i dont wana loose him as a friend :'(
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A
female
reader, anon2907  +, writes (7 August 2006):
 Ouch!
I think all things considered you did pretty OK - I mean when you showed her the texts, you only showed her the ones which were complimentary about her - and nothing else.
Not only that but you're right, he was insensitive to ask her out in front of you.
There's not much more you can do - you've said sorry what more does he want. If he keeps giving you grief, explain that you did the best you could when you were put on the spot when she was looking at your phone and that you think he's being unfair making out you've done something wrong.
(I'd be tempted to tell him to sod off and get over it, but maybe that's unduely harsh?)
Good luck with it anyway kazkitten!
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A
female
reader, kazzer30 +, writes (7 August 2006):
 he will get over it if he wants to keep you as a friend then he will ignore somut as silly as that try and talk to him again if he dont listern to you send him a text and if that dont work then just leave things as they are then he cant say u didnt try because you have he will want you before you want him hope you get it sorted xxxx
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