| A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: Ugg...Dude, I hate love.Ok, well, there's this boy in school. I'm 14 and he's 16. Well I was friends with one of his close friends, who is also 16. When I was hanging round with him, I used to p off this other boy becasue I just did'nt like him. He was annoying and sarcastic and I thought it was fun to annoy him. So we both hated each other, bassicaly. He was this stuck up idiot I loved to annoy and I was this annoying little wannabe girl who hanged around with his friend.But then one day he was drunk and I asked him to kiss me for a joke. But he did. Completey off it, oviously.But then I felt kind of weird. Proberly because it had been such a long time since I kissed a boy. I know I'm only 14, but I hav'nt really had many boyfriends at all to be honest. I'm not ugly or a reject or anything, I just hav'nt. Not that I'm really bothered at the moment though.But ever since then I've felt strange about this guy. I've notaced how handsome he is. And I mean REALLY pretty, when before I did'nt think he was anything special. Nobody else seems to be as beautiful.I've fallen out with his friend, the one I used to hang around with. So I never go near them anymore. But when I pass him in the halls, I feel really attracted to him.Now I feel really bad for being a stupid little girl to him, and I wish we actually got along. I really wish there was a chance for us.But why such a sudden change in heart? Is it just because I kissed him and I loved that? Do I not really have any feelings for him, am I just being desperate? Bearing in mind, he did'nt kiss me because he wanted to. He was just drunk. I know that.Also, he's not even someone I would normally fall for.And last thing, I've found that when I walk past him in the corridors he never looks at me, or walks by quickly. I've only just realised this.Oviously my first thought was, "Is he embarassed? Does he have any feelings for me?" but that's stupid.Why would someone like him suddenly like me, a little girl he hates who used to annoy the ass off him.The first time after we kissed, I walked past him and then I looked back and he had looked back with a confused face on.A while after I was talking to some people and someone said something to him and he did a half-hearted laugh and said, "Don't remind me...". Don't know if that was about me. Proberly.Ever since then he has never spoken about it, or even looked at me in the eye when we walk past each other.I've actaully now taken to shouting out to my friend's when he's near, just to make my presence known. I don't why, mabye I just don't like to be ignored.Today, while going into geography class I stood at the door and looked at him and his friend purpously as they walked past. His friend kept looking at me strait in the eye with a expression-less face as he walked past. I'm pretty sure that I'm just imagining this, because I know I WANT him to be embarassed and I WANT him to have 'secret feelings' for me.He's proberly just disgusted that he even touched me.So...what should I do? Nothing? I guess I could just bottle my emotions until he leaves school, but I hate doing that. It just tears me up inside.Should I say something to him? What? "Sorry for being a tit to you I actaully really fancy you I know you hate my guts"?Tell me if I sound stupid. :/
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female
reader, On Cloud9  +, writes (23 September 2007):
 My suggestion would be to tell him. You don't sound like a shrinking violet so I think you can handle whatever the result is, bearing in mind it could go either way but then atleast you will not spend valuable time thinking about him. If he says no then fine, atleast you will know and be able to get on with your life.
Before you do that though, it is worth remembering that it makes sense that he is acting off towards you, after all thats exactly what you were to him and he probably still thinks that you are that annoying girl. If it is true that first impressions count then you may have a lot of back peddling to do to let him see you are not like that. Maybe you could make up with your mutual friend and instead of being insulting to him, be a laugh and share jokes with him, instead of him being the joke.
Guys never take well to ego brusing lol - wish you all the best.
A
female
reader, leanne.od +, writes (21 September 2007):
 guys do things when they are drunk.
he's 16 and you were probablt overwhelmed by the fact he payed an interest in you. unfortunaltely, he more likely than not can't even remember it, so my suggestion is to move on and find someone else.
good luck
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