A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Ok so I've met a girl and we get on really well. I want to ask her out, but there is a problem: Some people I know, who also know her, have told me she is a little crazy. Apparently she caused a whole load of problems with her ex boyfriend, and some people have even told me the boyfriend in question was made up by her. When I first met her I could tell she was kinda highly strung--she talks quite fast and is very energetic, but I just thought that was part of who she was, and in some weird way I guess it just made her more attractive to me. Another thing is she seems quite childish sometimes--I was surprised when she told me she was nineteen, as she seemed more like sixteen to me.I know this isn't really a lot of information to go on. It could be just stupid and nasty rumours. But I cant think of why my friends have told me this stuff about her. I'm sure they wouldn't lie to me. I realise I must make my own judgement too, but I don't want to start a relationship with her, only to find she actually IS some crazy Glenn Close type or something. What do I do?
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female
reader, sugarplum786  +, writes (3 December 2013):
 If you like her, go out with her as friends and make up your mind. The woman you go on a date with does not necessarily become your GF. Give it a shot and give her a fair chance without any preconceived ideas/notions that people have planted.
If you don't you will wonder if you missed a chance ...
A
female
reader, Honeypie  +, writes (2 December 2013):
 You want to date someone who seems 16? Whether she is nuts or not, THAT right there would stop me cold. Dating a child, that is what you are looking at.
If there ARE things about her you like then go slow slow slow. Get to know her. As for rumors.. well, I think it's more important that you LEARN to trust your own instincts then listen to rumors.
The rumors were not even constant. Some said ex bf drama, OTHER said she didn't even have a BF he was made up, so how can you trust those rumors?
If you are 22-25 maybe a 19 year old is a little immature for you?
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (2 December 2013): While you can't be sure how true the rumours are, to be honest it's probably that she's simply too immature. Many 19 yr olds can act like they're completely mature, but in fact they haven't quite got there yet. I don't think crazy would be the word, just too immature to act like a reasonable adult when in a relationship.
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A
male
reader, CMMP +, writes (2 December 2013):
Well, try dating her for a little bit and take this slow. I doubt she's an axe murderer, the word 'crazy' is used a little too liberally.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (2 December 2013): Sometimes people are misunderstood. I know a girl who ended up with amnesia and a girl who was close to her went around and was saying that she was crazy and was feeding her information to get her to apologise for things she didn't do, and now people think similar things to what you have heard about this girl you like. It turned out that the girl with amnesia really was just a genuinely nice girl who this other girl was tormenting. It is good to be cautious but making up your own mind is important. I suggest you get to know her better, and take it slow and make up your own mind. The girl I know that had amnesia was about to get married to the love of her life and the rumours and lies that were told destroyed her life, she now is in therapy and has a lot of pain to deal with caused by people making assumptions about things they knew nothing about.
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