A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:i meet this boy at a party and i went out with him bestmate but we didnt work and me this boy been talking and we got too know each other a little bit better and became really close and attached too eachother, an reccently he told me he likes me i felt the same way too we started going out a few months ago we been togever now 4 months im just scared too love him cause he leaves me im scared too lose him because i dont want no one eles apart from him just dont see myself getting with no one eles or anyone eles with have me i feel kinda losted when im not with him i constanly think about him.. do i love him? what should i do i dont no anymore ive run out off ideas we keep argueing he just dont get it i know he loves me just i love him so much, just think im not good enought for him think i should let him go? Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Odds  +, writes (15 February 2011):
 Girls tend to punish themselves (and the guys they date) if they are being treated better than they believe they deserve. This is not about the guy, it's about you. You would probably feel the same way with any guy that was even remotely respectful of you.
Breaking up with him will nto solve the problem.
You need to work on your own confidence and self-esteem. I'm not saying be a narcissist here, just honeslty and rationally consider your good points. Would you consider yourself humble? Considerate? A secret, hopeless romantic?
What about your flaws? I'm sure you can think of some. How many could you solve if you really tried? If you worry too much, learn to fix whatever it is you're worrying about. If you treat people badly, start actively trying to be nicer. You get the idea. Everyone has flaws, most can be fixed.
As for love, that's not for me to answer. After four months, I doubt it, but that's still your call. I'd be more concerned over whether you can really love yourself, right down to your flaws and weaknesses - even as you work to overcome them.
A
female
reader, amylee2  +, writes (15 February 2011):
 u shud leave him... dont EVA EVA EVA depend on sum1 soo much.. they have all the power to hurt u.. ime goin through a similiar situation.. thing is, love is a very harsh thing,, my aadvice is to try to get sum time away from tht guy
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A
female
reader, Hacienda +, writes (15 February 2011):
 if you love him that is a question only YOU can answer. you need to step back a little and look at yourself, ofcourse its going to cause fights if you're convinced your not good enough for someone who obviously thinks you are! you should NEVER think you arent good enough for anyone, in order to be loved by others you have to learn to love yourself too. even if you dont think you are worth it, dont you think he should be the one who decides if you're worth his time? if you love him then go for it, love comes with heart break, heartbreak comes with love and only time will tell what the relationship has in store for you. Stop questioning yourself and enjoy what you have! never limit yourself though, even if it doesnt work out you will heal and move on, it may not feel like it but you will. but you might not even have to. At the end of the day, enjoy the relationship you have nothing to lose and some much to gain! all relationships come with ups and downs. if you love him then love him! there is no greater feeling than to love and be loved. But do not, and I cant stress this enough, hide yourself away from fear of being hurt. believe me. it sounds cliche but it's better to love and risk the pain than live your life never knowing.
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