A
male
age
36-40,
*opelesswonder
writes:I just turned 22, and yes, am still a virgin and it gets me incredibley depressed, i haven't had many relationships either, and those few that i have had were... stressful, due to that type of woman that either i attract or the type that i seem to go for, which are nuts lol, and then turn out to be two timers, i dont know why, maybe its cos im a 'nice guy'. now, im not ugly, but i dont have much hair so i shave it, and what is probably a surprise, is that i am in the Royal air force, so, you could say i have a pretty good physique, and health. but i am in no-way the steriotypical forces guy that has many girls at every camp, thats just not me.So, i have to lie, almost every day, about not being a virgin. Which i only do to avoid ridicule. i dont want to have sex just for the sake of having sex, i want to fall in love so that it feels right. i dont think i have been in love before, because if that was love, then love hurts too much.I dont like being a virgin, I hate it in fact, I'm not religous but im not going to waste it on a drunken night with someone who does not have mutual feelings.I Know that wasn't much of a question, i guess what im asking is what can i do to meet someone who will understand or feel the same way. its really starting to get to me and affect my life and work, which is a well payed job that i dont want to lose because of deppression. Thankyou for reading x
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depressed, drunk, still a virgin Reply to this Question
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male
reader, hopelesswonder +, writes (15 January 2010):
hopelesswonder is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthanks again for the replys, some good sound advice there, that told some great truths, some people say that sex isnt that important, or losing ur virginity, but it is to me, and i cant stop feeling about it that way. its frustrating, i want to lose it asap, yet i want it to be meaningfull, lol. Im not exactly making it easy on myself.
A
male
reader, RAINORFIRE  +, writes (12 January 2010):
 funny I bet half those other guys are lying like you are. Any way i dont see whats the big deal you will get bored with sex after awhile and even when you have a gf you will spend all your free time watching porn and playing video games.
I dont think you can find the type of girl your looking for, i suggest take a break stop looking, cuse when your your desperate you dont make good choices,
Money is better then a gf its better to be a rich virgin then a bum with a bunch of girls and kids.
I suggest investing see how mutch money you can get. dont be depressed over this, it sounds like you want a relationship but we dont always get what we want in life i want a castle and six yachts in the carribbean, so theres no gurantee you could be alone forever but life could be worst get over it.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (12 January 2010): i just turned 25 and i lost my virginity 3 weeks ago - it was special or romantic or with who it should have been with. I hated being a virgin, not because i didn't like it but because of what other people thought of being an older virgin. Do you know what, sex is not what i thought it would be. It is just one experience and i discovered i am still me, no change, i just have a bit more knowledge on how the "parts" fit and move together. I wouldn't feel down about being a virgin - yeah others can make you feel bad about it but if you are confident within yourself then it doesn't matter what experience you do or do not have. i wish i had known that 4 weeks ago, i would never have screwed up like i did. You'll find a lass out there and i was in your boat, people either ask wheter you are a virgin or assume you are not ... it doesn't matter what you are, you are you and you'll find a lass that will respect that. Heck, i respect that - virgin or non-virgin, a good guy is one hell of a catch :)
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A
male
reader, hopelesswonder +, writes (11 January 2010):
hopelesswonder is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for the replys guys, i do go out, quite alot, with my mates, and i do get off with the occasional girl when im out of my face, but i never sleep with them, cos i know that im wasted (im kind of a sober drunk) and i dont want it to happen like that, and i gotta say, my confidence isnt that high. And most women (no offence intended) seem to have an automatic opinion of me when they find out im in the forces.
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A
female
reader, weepingwillow  +, writes (11 January 2010):
Hey! Well you know what, I think that its great that you're waiting for the right person to lose your virginity to. I too am a virgin and was in a few relationships that weren't quite right. I felt (and sometimes still do feel) really uncomfortable when all my friends were talking about their first time having sex, and when they started asking me if I had lost my virginity yet. But you know what, I know a few of them regretted losing their virginity to somebody they didn't love. I'm really glad that I didn't make that mistake. And believe me, when you finally do meet the right girl (and trust me, you will), she will appreciate it all the more that you didn't just sleep around. As for finding a girl who feels the same, I guess you could try the usual going to clubs, but you really don't need to worry, you sound like a really sweet guy and there aren't many of those so you'll soon be snapped up!
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (11 January 2010): You have to get out there and date. Thats the only real option here.Go online, go to clubs, join a sports team, get set up by friends... its all good.Eventually you'll find someone you wish to bone the hell out of. And she/he will want to bone you right back and all will be right with the world.Flynn 24
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (11 January 2010): maybe if you stop lying about it.
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