A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:My girlfriend and i broke up at the beginning of the year - she said that I wasn't enjoying life which is true and that I need to go and do my thing in the world as i am often very depressed and disillusioned with the world (i don't see any point in the rubbish jobs i've been doing and have been unhappy with my lifestyle for a long time).However we were both very sad to break up and the idea was that I would go away to teach for a while and then we would see where we stand after. However, I have been offered a job in February in China but that will be over a year since breaking up. I am also unwell and have been seeking medical advice for CFS the last year but things have been slower than I'd hoped for. FOr the first 6 months my ex was sporadically phoning me to ask about getting back together and saying that it was a waste of a relationship as she thought I would have been and gone but as much as i wanted to I couldn't say what the plans would be. I want to be with her but told her it was unfair for me to promise anything either way and that she had to do what was best for happiness and health. I was worried that if i got back without doing other things in life I wouldn't be happy and her happiness would suffer.Now she had blocked me from facebook and hasn't spoken to me for months. She got it in her head that we broke up because i didn;t want her and seems to have skewed the reasons why we're not together. I care about her so much and think about her everyday.I want to text her but fear that is opening another can of worms and will just upset her more.I've been thinking about scrapping my travel plans and trying to get back with her as I'm constantly thinking of her and the fact that she will definitely be gone for good if i go and teach. But whilst I can't bare thought of her not being in my life I also feel I need the experience of going abroad to make something of my life.I don;t know what to do.Any advice would be most welcome.Many thanks
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