A
female
age
41-50,
*isdeeds
writes: Originally Posted by Beautiful Disaster You just do. I know it sounds like I'm simplifying it...but that's just the honest truth. If you're waiting for the moment when it feels "right" to end your relationship, or doesn't hurt...you'll never do it. It DOES hurt to walk away from someone you care about. It WILL hurt. You WILL feel lonely and there will be moments of loneliness in which you feel regret for ending it. There will be moments in which you are able to forget all the bad and dwell on only the good. But that's just part of breaking up and moving on. Staying strong in your decision throughout those moments is what is important.You're wasting precious life being unhappy and abused... selling yourself short. It's time to stop wasting your time trying to fix him in hopes he will change and start the focus on you and work on yourself to figure out WHY you're willing to do that.It's just bothering me that he can say he loves and cares about me but he can just stay silent. Let me explain what happened. He wanted me to meet him at a restaurant near by because a couple of co-workers retired that day. He wanted to have a couple drinks, I said okay cool, I'll meet you there. Well, I get there and we sit at the bar while his coworkers sat on the other side of the restaurant. He's looking over where everyone was and I'm thinking we were gonna go over where they were but we didn't. He said he didn't want everyone to know who he was close to meaning me. I'm like wth!!! Why did he ask me to come then? I'm thinking this. I felt uncomfortable then and wanted to leave by that time. He knew I was bothered cause he continued to ask me about it. Well as we walked out to my car a female walked in and he said he stopped talking to her because she talked to much but later on he told me that they used to be involved. I felt like **********. My thinking now is really all over the place. I'm like ******** you walked me to my car and you went back in there knowing she was there. I was pissed!!! I felt like when he saw her he shoulda asked me to stay or shoulda left!!! But instead, he stayed. I asked him later if those people were not his friends, why did he even go???!!! Now let me say this, I've been to a dinner before with him and coworkers so I didn't understand why this time was so different, until I found out that there was an old flame there. He text me after I left and said I'm sorry bae, I need you to understand. I'm like wtf is to understand!!!! That crap looked real messed up!!! I told him there was nothing to talk about but as the evening went on, I was getting more angry. I called him and we argued and he hung up me, I called back several times and he sent me to voicemail. I text him and said we needed to have a heart to heart talk about our future cause I don't wanna go on like this. That's when the silent treatment began. He got all extra mad like this was my fault when I know it clearly wasn't. Had the roles been reversed, he would've acted a stone fool!!!! Now here I am today thinking and wondering if this relationship is even worth it. He has a lot if double standards and its getting on my ******** nerves. I give and give because I love him, but he's wearing me down....any suggestions???
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female
reader, janniepeg  +, writes (5 January 2013):
 This post is very odd. The only reason why he brought you there was that he likes to provoke drama. There certainly were more shady things he did before this, to bring you to a point of a meltdown. When you are dealing with a person who does not make sense, you can't try to understand him. So give up trying to understand him. His silent treatment should give you the chance to move on and focus on yourself. Instead you are wondering why he's silent. You can spend a lifetime trying to understand him and get nothing in return. You don't have to wait until your feelings for him are gone to let him go. If he contacts you again promise yourself not to pick up the phone.
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