A  ,
*elsi
writes:What would you consider the best signs being in regards to a 55 year old woman flirting with a 48 year old woman? What signs would you look for in order to get a better handle on whether or not she is flirting with you?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (30 December 2009): Ah! If only it were as easy as the agony uncle above has advised!
I find myself in exactly the same position as you Elsi. In fact, I found your questions as I was looking for answers for myself.
I didn't find any on the net. So I drafted a more detailed post than yours asking for advice. I didn't post it anywhere. Instead, I roleplayed an agony aunt and wrote my own answers!
That was very helpful indeed. The #1 answer I came up with was 'What do I want from this?'. Then 'What's important to me here?'
I realised that I have to tell my friend that I'm feeling confused by her teasing and what appears to be flirting and some of the things she says to me. And then I have to ask her what she's saying these things for - and really listen to her answers.
I realised that if my friend can't answer straightforwardly with honesty (and no fuss/embarrassment) then she is not going to be the partner I want. Nor, really, is she a friend if she can play such games.
It's a risk for sure. I am risking losing what has been a very interesting and supportive friendship for a number of years. But everything changes, some friendships deepen and some end as we grow and change ourselves.
Certainly, my friend wants more from me and has clearly and bravely said so, but hasn't defined what. Now I need to step up and help move us on to whatever is next.
I wish you courage and good fortune however your friendship turns out. Whichever way, if handled with respect and care, it's a matter of 'Que sera, sera'!
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (14 December 2009): As you are not a teenybopper and nor is she I would ask her directly if she is flirting with you.
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