A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I am in a relation with a guy since last 3 years, he is very aggressive. not only with me but also to his family members, so i just accept this thing as his nature. He is having a female friend who proposed to him for marriage 3 yrs back, but he told her that he loves me...and they can be just good friends. She calls him frequently. he talks to her in front of me and always tells me everything about their conversation, though in their group there are more boys...and she is the only girl. She always tell him that she feels secure with him(i hate her). Once i was on a call with him... suddenly he received a call from her...and i was angry because of her call. Instead of making me understand he shouted at me and said that i dont trust him ... i trust him a lot and i also love him... but i dont know how to react at their friendship...i feel jealous when he talks to her... please help me n tell me how to react at such situation.
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female
reader, Dear Mandy  +, writes (9 May 2011):
 HiIt's no wonder you feel the way you do, I would be very wary of this girl, she sounds like she doesn't care who she hurts, as long as she is the centre of attention. BUT you can can be one better than her, have you ever heard of the saying keep your friends close, but your enemies even closer?? well here's what you do.1) Tell your partner your not sorry for loving him, but your sorry that he feels you dont trust him because you do.2)tell him you have been thinking about it, and you would like to meet her and maybe you all go out for a drink together and put the past behind you.3) be really nice to her, this will make her confused, she will want to know why your letting him be friends with her, and that she isn't won by trying to split you both up .4) he will feel less trapped, and less willing to upset you , and will probally get bored of her being around so much. 5) ask her if she would like to go out one night for a girlie night, this way you can see what she is like around other guys, whether or not she is flirtatious, or goes off with different guys, you will be able to then say to your partner, I like her , she seems like a nice girl, but I dont really want to be out with her when she is going off with lots of guys, as it will make me look bad.this way if he IS doing things behind your back with her you will definately know, when he gets angry with her and stops all comunication with her. but always remember to be really nice to her, I know this will be hard at first because you dislike her so much, but the more you do this, the stronger you will get, and the more you will enjoy spoiling her plot to ruin things for you two. My only reason for me to say to you to let this guy go, is because he is aggressive towards you and his onw family,this kind of man, could be very dangerous, yet you say you put up with it as his always been this way. I have a feeling you could probaally find a better man than this anyway.I hope this has helped
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