A
female
age
36-40,
*eany22
writes:I have recently just split from my lesbian relationship. We had been together for 1 year but had known each other for 3 years, there had always been an attraction between us but I was in a straight relationship and she was involved with someone. When we finally got together she moved in with me and my daughter and I lost a lot of friends and family after telling them that I was in a gay relationship. Everything was going well we went on holiday as a family and we even bought a puppy together but it all changed last week when she turned round and said that she couldn't afford to live with me and my daughter and was going back to her dad's. I didn't really understand why but agreed that it was ok and that we would still stay together just live apart but then i went away as it was already booked ages ago with my daughter and family. The first night I was away we spoke and she told me she loved me and missed me loads but then by the second night when i said i loved her she didnt reply and when i asked why she couldnt say it she hung up on me i had no contact untill i returned and she sent me a text saying she thinks its for the best if we end it i am totally heart broken i feel as though my life has ended but now even though she has moved out all her stuff is still at my place all her mail still comes here and she comes to take the dog out for a walk every other day when i asked her last night why we cant be together she told me she has met someone else and has moved on.How can I move on if she keeps coming round all the time and she still wants contact with my 5 yr old daughter who dont understand why she has gone. I don't know how I can move on my heart is totally broken and seeing her every day knowing she is with someone else is making it harder for me pls help
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lesbian, move on, moved in, moved out, on holiday, text Reply to this Question
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female
reader, beany22 +, writes (19 March 2008):
beany22 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthank yu so much for your kind words that means alot to me i have seen my ex again today and told her exactly how i feel about her coming roundand seeing my daughter i cant get over her by seeing her so much she cried when i said it was best not to come round to let me sort my head.when u say about her not being able to have children we had a consulation lastmonth we were going to have her eg implanted in me so that it would be both of our child this breaks my heart so much knowing that this will never happen i have butter flies in my stomach every time i see her and then when she goes my heart breaks a bit more each time i do truly love this girl with all my heart and i dont think will ever stop loving her but i know i have to move on i just dont know how too
A
reader, anonymous, writes (18 March 2008): Dear sweety, I felt so sad when I read your words because you are obviously totally and completely in love with her. The tenderness you have shines out of your language and you obviously sacrificed a huge amount to be with her. Well done to you, I don't know many people who would have been so brave. You are one of life's bright and shining people, warm and genuine, gentle and sincere.I know that my words will not help you though because you are in pain. This awful pain is the one that is suffered when people really love and lose. There is nothing you can do but grasp it and hold it close, just like childbirth (I am sure you remember that)it will end although you can't imagine that at the time!Maybe she felt under pressure and could not face being in your relationship. I know she says there is someone else but do you know that is true or is she saying it to make you realise that it really is over? as with any other ending there is usually a time of transition and that is what you have. She is keeping up some routines and likely feels responsible for the things you started together and for her relationship with your daughter. It is up to you whether you want her to continue with these things. I probably would like her to, but not let her, because it would not be a good idea. The sooner you show her that you take what she has done seriously, the better. As soon as you possibly can, even if you are pretending, be firm and finish this thing properly. She may come back into your life sometime, in which case you don't know how you would feel about her then. However, there could be all sorts of good reasons why she has left. For instance she has met your daughter but knows if she stayed with you she would never have one of her own? Perhaps you already know what she thinks about this - may or may not have any meaning.You could say if she was in any doubt she should not have started it bearinf in mind that you have a small child, but people don't always understand themselves at the time.All best wishes.
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