A
female
age
41-50,
*arahjeanne
writes:When my boyfriend looks at porn, it's of transvestites. i've also found emails where he's talked to transvestites. When i ask about it he gets really upset and denies everything. i'm very hurt that he won't be open with me. He's admitted to liking to wear women's clothing, which i'm fine with! he says he loves me, but what i don't understand is how i fit in to a relationship with a transvestite who is attracted to other transvestites. i don't have a penis, am i ever going to be enough for him?
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female
reader, AuntyEm  +, writes (17 May 2012):
 I agree...you need to walk from this one. Being transvestite doesn't mean he is necesarilly gay, but it does mean that there are some things that sexually, you cannot fulfil.
He is on his own path and is determined to get what he wants...the question is what do you want?
If it's a loving hetero relationship where you can go on to have kids, then this guy probably isn't for you...
Yes of course you could go on to have kids with him, but then you have to consider the social impact that will have on those children.
Another thing to consider is that he may begin to choose to live as a woman...or go further and want a sex change...how will that affect your life then?
This is NOT about him...it's about your life, your hopes and dreams and your happiness...he is already pursuing his and if you sacrifice yourself just so you can stay with him, I think you face a lot of sadness in the future.
A
female
reader, YouWish +, writes (17 May 2012):
 I think you're right. You're not going to be enough for him. Liking transvestite porn is one thing. Emailing them regarding sex is inappropriate, and you'd have to forever look over your shoulder whenever he got a tranny itch that needed scratching.
The fact that he's emailing transvestites about sex is no different than if he were emailing or texting other women, or if you were texting or emailing other men sexually. No different.
He is not faithful, transvestite or no. Best to walk away.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (17 May 2012): He's either gay or bi sexual. Clearly he's going through a very curious stage. You're obviously straight. This is not the relationship for you.
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