A
female
age
,
anonymous
writes:How can I get this man back as a friend? met him fairly recently and became friends on holiday-nothing more-unfortunately I started developing feelings for him and told him and of course he has run a mile.I KNOW its all my fault but all my life I have been a loving person and have a lot of love to give-but its unrequited!!!!!!! How can I undo the damage? I would like to keep in touch now and again and try and undo what Ive done. How do I do this please (I know its up to him whether he responds or not) but id like to give it a shot-so perhaps a few months quietness then a nice friendly e mail out of the blue?????
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female
reader, Tisha-1  +, writes (6 August 2008):
 I don't know, he ran a mile when you told him you had feelings for him? I don't think he's going to change his mind in a couple of months, so dropping an email later probably won't work. I guess it couldn't hurt, but don't count on anything.
The thing I'd be concerned about with you is that you don't put your life on hold or spend a lot of time analyzing him. It's just not worth it; he's not going to change, I think. Is he in the same age bracket as you are? If he is, then he's probably pretty set in his ways and will be difficult to shift.
If I were in your shoes, I'd drop him, forget about him and start getting busy with the activities and clubs and classes where I might meet a man who actually IS available and wants to have a relationship.
There have been a bunch of questions from women here recently who met men on holiday. They didn't have sex with the men on holiday, then when they tried to stay in touch with the men later, they learned that the men were really only interested in a short holiday fling, not a long-term relationship. Could be this guy falls into the 'looking for a quick fling' category, in which case, he's not worth the trouble.
Take care!
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