A
female
age
22-25,
anonymous
writes: I have a huge crush on my friend. Its my second crush. My friend is a girl, so that means im bisexual. Should I tell anyone or wait?
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female
reader, chigirl +, writes (28 January 2014):
I think you should tell people if you want to. There's no rules on this, you can tell anyone what you want as long as you are comfortable about it. But you don't have an obligation to inform anyone if you want to wait.
However, I found it very relieving to tell at least one or two friends, just to have someone know. But after that, I didn't feel a need to inform anyone else, unless I was actually asked about it, or if it happened to come up as a topic. But each to their own.
If you think your parents or anyone you know might react negatively, maybe you should tell only a close friend at first, just to feel more comfortable about it. It is easier to tell others once you've told someone.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (28 January 2014): You are very young, so coming out is not a good idea until you are old enough to understand your feelings. It doesn't mean you should be ashamed of them. Just give yourself time to figure them out, and better understand them.
At your age, your feelings can shift around; and you are still in your earliest stage of emotional and psychological development. You are just starting to go through puberty; and crushes don't necessarily determine if you're bisexual.
Sexuality and sexual-orientation is very complicated; and the reactions you get from people when coming out can be very powerful. People much older than you have a great deal of difficulty in handling the reactions they get from people. So spreading the news all over, may get reactions from people you are not really prepared for.
It is better to wait until you're older so you are sure, and able to deal with people who will not be very kind in reaction to something you're not even absolutely sure about.
I am gay, and very experienced.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (28 January 2014): I experimented with other boys at your age and I'm straight as an arrow. Don't bother coming out until you actually have tried a relationship with a girl.
You're just bicurious at the moment and that's not a sexuality. You could even be lesbian. Until you know for certain how feel then there's nothing to come out about.
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