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female
,
anonymous
writes: My fiance can't forgive me for my past and the fact that it took me so long to tell him about it. How can I convince him that it is not due to a lack of trust but lack of self confidence in me?
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reader, anonymous, writes (13 February 2006): Lady Anonymous, maybe you can show him this link (your post)? If he is a sensible person, he may pick up your sincerity. If he isn't, then damn... 8[
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (13 February 2006): Well, there is nothing you can do about it as long as you have explain your situation to him. Same as you, i have an unbearable past, but i made the decision to tell the guy every time i start a relationship. Yes, it hurts. You never know if he is the man of your life. If you ended breaking up with heaps of them and heaps of them know about your past. I would rather say it out than getting worry every day or tell him at the stage that i am afraid of losing him.To me, what had happened is the past, to prevent myself from getting hurt. I feel like it is my obligation to tell the truth when you start a relationship. It is fair for both parties and it will do good for both.
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A
female
reader, smeedle  +, writes (13 February 2006):
 Right well you know what has to be done, you need to finish your relationship with him, if he does not trust you then you have no basis for a strong relationship let alone a marriage.
He is definatly insecure and not you, he has the problem with your past, the past is just that.
What ever is in your past you have left behind and so should he, it is not necessary to tell anyone about our past unless it is likely to hurt the relationship in the future, you do not have to go into details but it sounds like you were open and honest with him and he just cannot get over this.
When did he expect you to tell him you had history, on day one, I bet he has a past and I bet you dont know everything in it.
Make him history, find some new love who is not so wrapped up in himself.
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