A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:To bluntly put it, I cheated on my hubby last night. It was a quick one night stand, no one knows about it, all evidence is gone and it was a few cities away from home.. I dont feel it eating away at me so.. Should i keep this to myself? We have an alright relationship, we make it work. Should i throw this wrench in there or keep on like nothing happened?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (30 June 2015): If you don't feel it eating away at you then the problem is that you don't care enough about your husband's feelings or about your vows. Even if he never finds out, the fact that you callously cheated without the slightest conscience means that you disrespect him as a person.
Do him a favour and show him this post that you've written.
A
male
reader, Garbo +, writes (30 June 2015):
 Given that you view your ONS as a morally acceptable act, I think that the real issue here is pointlessness of your marriage. If you are married yet you violate its fundamental principle of loyalty and trust then it really does not matter how functional your marriage is. What you did, first and foremost, is about yourself because you violated yourself after you made vowels that you won't. The fact that such violation does not matter to you speaks more about who you are rather than what your husband may think about it or how he will react. Victims of every crime eventually learn how to cope with their loss and move on but the perpetrators are always concerned with escaping the consequences rather than realizing that they are empty of empathy.
So, I would suggest that you are better off being not married because, at least, you would not have to waste time asking about these social norms which you have no feeling for. Your man may fret but eventually he will be better off without you, as much you will be free of him to pursue your joy.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (30 June 2015): I think you already know. Let me put it this way should you do the convenient thing for you, or the right thing for your husband? Doesn't he deserve to have a choice if he stays or goes?
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A
female
reader, Tisha-1 +, writes (30 June 2015):
 P.S. Don't have sex with your husband until you have been tested for STIs. It's one thing to cheat, it's entirely another to give your husband a life-altering disease. *ahem*
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A
female
reader, Tisha-1 +, writes (30 June 2015):
I don't really know what to advise here.
Let's take it from another viewpoint. Your hubby cheated last night when you were out of town, it was a quick one night stand, no one knows about it, all evidence is gone and it happened out of town. He doesn't feel it eating away at him, so should he keep this to himself?
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (30 June 2015):
 You should grow a set of ovaries and tell your husband. It may not be eating away at you - which I guess is OK for you - but give your husband the CHOICE to decide if he wants to be with a wife who sleeps around with a random stranger. IF he wants to risk catching a STD from his wife.
You make it sound like you bought a gallon of 1% instead of two and just didn't feel like telling your husband, because hey he may never know, right?
But YOU really NEED to own your actions. You didn't buy a different kind of milk.. you F#CKED another man. A man who ISN'T your husband. Unless you two have an "open marriage" HOW is that OK? Would you be OK with him having a ONS with some random chick?
Why are you even married? Why not be single? So you can screw whomever you like and not have to answer to anyone?
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