A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: hi i am looking for some help, i have just lost my first love and there is alot i dont understand. the first 10 months of our relationship were great full of love we were even trying for a baby at 1 point but we broke up once or twice in that time and ma gf would ask me back out and we would sort it out, but the last 2 months have been a bit rocky i have taken advantage of her and been a dick really but i split us up cos of lil arguments and i was determind that it was wat i wanted but my gf begged and pleaded wit me to such an extent i had to give in, she told me that we will have a weeks break then we wont see each other everyday of the week. so the week break began and she started going out with her friend and her friends bf and he has a few of his mates out with him to and they just go out in the car anyway this happend for the first week as agreed then the next week came i seen her monday didnt see her tuesday she was out with them, seen her for an our wednesday then she went out with them, then i didnt see her thursday and then friday she text me sayin im goin to a house party tonight which really pissed me off because i wanted to see her so much that week and i ended it again (the biggest mistake of my life)but i ended it friday nov 9th our 1 year aniversary was on sunday 11th. but this time she didnt seem boverd and i didn here from her till the next day and she jus sed i got some of your stuff ile drop it to you and we told eachother that we will b better as mates. but the fact that it didn bother her botherd me and its getting worse and worse bothering me more and more. this is wen i realised how stupid and rude i have been and i am a changed person i no deep in my heart i am and i no how much i want this to work and so i begged and pleaded with her went down her house and managed to get her to give me another chance.(this is where i dont understand what has happend) she gave me another chance and that day we were getting on great just like we did when we were happy together, to try and cut a long story a bit short i got home and she text me she dont think its what she wants but she will give it this week to see how it goes. in the week everytime i wanted to see her she went out with her mates in the car i seen her only a couple of times, but during these times she was so happy with me and loving but then wen she wernt with me she texts me saying its not what i want, i tryed absolutly everything to try and convince her it is but she just kept saying she dont want it, anyway today she told me she wanted to end it because she dont want to drag me on. what i cant understand is why shes so happy and loving when shes with me then its like shes a different person by text, i have run out of space i will finish in a comment on the side ---
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broke up, text, trying for a baby Reply to this Question Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (18 November 2007): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionalso i dont understand why she went from wanting it so much to not wanting it not atall...
Thanks pgissyd for your reply i will take that into mind
A
female
reader, pgissyd +, writes (17 November 2007):
HI Anon, I think maybe she has discovered the single scen is a lot more fun than being tied down. Let her go and try to move on. I know that sounds harsh and It will be easier said than done. But try hooking up with some of your mates, go out a for a ew nights with them and have some fun. Dont bother to contact her at all for a week or two. then when your ready, contact her and tell her you need to talk.
Then both of you get comfy and chat about EVERYTHING, from sex to living together, to what you both do when your out separately, to if she or you have interests in other people, to trust issues. It may help to make a list.
If you are both looking for different things in the relationship front, then it just wont work. Maybe things will be different when you are both a little older, but for now you are oung and have the need to enjoy life and see a bit more of the world.
Even if you two do decide part ways, you can still stay in contact, stay friends and suport each other through tough times. I would guess you would get on better as friends anyway, but thats simply a guess.
You sound like a sensitive guy and a lot of women love that, so if it turns out you two are not a dream team, dont worry, there are plenty of women who would find you the perfect guy for tehm and vice versa.
Good luck and take care xxxxxxx
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