A
male
age
30-35,
*uke7
writes:well im 16, i need help greatlyevrytime i go to have sex with my girlfreind my errection doesnt come iv attempeted 3 times with her. the 1st time, my penis wouldnt come errect. The second i was drunk with her. it would get errect but it hurt her, so we waited till the next day.3rd time was the next day and we were jus messin round and my penis was errect, and when she took off her cloths and i took off mine, my penis wouldnt become errectiv read alot of things about this like its to do with stress etc. but it is really getting me down as i think i cant forfill my girlfreinds needs and its brining my slef confidence down.im a confident atletic person who doesnt smoke and rarely drinks. i dont understand i need help badly.thank you very much in advance :)
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Artistry  +, writes (12 August 2008):
 Hey, Why not try longer foreplay. Stroking, cuddling, relaxing, talking about nothing at all, have a little music in the background. I've heard of a little whipped cream and cherries, make it an adventure, instead of just a sexual encounter. It would also make it better if the two of you, especially you, were not tired. You are both young so, with time this all should get better. I also think that you are putting a lot of pressure on yourself to perform, and what she is thinking of your performance. If this is your first real girlfriend, the two of you should talk about what is going on, sometimes you can be sexually satisfied without intercourse, it takes practice, but very strong sexual feelings can be accomplished without penetration, you will ultimely get there, but the foreplay can be a mind blower, if you work on it. Also a good book on the subject could help you, look through a lot of books before you make your selection. For the moment, try to relax, take a shower together, and see where that leads. Take care, you have a lot of life to live, time will help with all things. Take it slow, there is nothing to get anxious about, if you care about each other, you will wait on the satisfaction on both sides. Be well.
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