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I can't control my ejaculation when she gives me a blow job. How can I last longer?

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Question - (6 May 2008) 8 Answers - (Newest, 23 February 2011)
A male United States age 41-50, anonymous writes:

Alright I've got a strange question for you all. When my girlfriend gives me a handjob it feels good until it starts chafing obviously but then she might switch to giving me head or whatever and it feels good also but its not until she starts giving me a handjob again after shes put her mouth on it, meaning the saliva as a lube. Thats where the trouble comes. I mean it feels really good but it seems like once it hits that spot the ability to control cum release or delay it becomes an issue. So I guess my question is do you have any suggestions for how to last longer / deal with a situation like this? Because it doesn't seem like its going that fast but if I were to ejaculate from a handjob it would be more on my terms because it would feel good but it would be more of a mental concentration to get the gasm to actually occur. But if its the handjob with the saliva lube it seems more out of control and therefore less buildup and more of me cumming then gasming.

View related questions: ejaculate, ejaculation, hand-job, last longer

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A reader, anonymous, writes (23 February 2011):

I think you should relax and just enjoy it. It doesn't matter in this case, its natural. However, I have suffered from this myself and I found a helpful manual on premature ejaculation: http://0c6f7-x6s9sv7nf1kkuzph2qfd.hop.clickbank.net

I hope it can help you and others reading this.

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A male reader, DoubleM United States +, writes (7 May 2008):

DoubleM agony auntYeah, I have one other suggestion. Don't worry about it so much. The more that you worry about things like sexual performance, the worse the problems seem to grow. You are young, so if you do even a little bit to improve your performance you are light years ahead of most guys (most of whom will never improve). So . . . do not obsess about any of this - enjoy yourself, make your women as happy as you can and live long. Relax and best wishes.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (7 May 2008):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

So as far as lasting longer I should practice holding my pee during urination and squeezing my buttocks during near orgasm times? Any other tips?

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A male reader, DoubleM United States +, writes (6 May 2008):

DoubleM agony auntOkay - Regarding lasting longer. That's a good question, because it can take years to really master. The real solution is age and a procedure called "Kegel exercises." It basically involves squeezing your "pee muscles" over a long period of time as practice. You can learn more about the Kegels on this Web site and elsewhere online. Much of "lasting a long time" is mental, but the Kegels can become a tremendous help in your sex life eventually - and women will be extremely impressed if you can master it. They will not necessarily know how you succeed in lasting but will love you for such an ability.

Essentially, you practice by cutting off your urine flow while taking a leak - several times for a few seconds or more. Holding mid-stream for about 10 seconds at a time is good practice. It teaches you to hold back an ejaculation eventually. Another way to lessen the urge to ejaculate too soon is to allow the woman to ride atop - the woman-on-top position that we call "Cowgirl" in Texas. For some reason, it is usually a little harder for most men (or at least me) to climax when flat on the back. I'm a much older man, but in my case, I still refrain from letting my lady "go down" until she has fully been satisfied and it is my turn. A good blow job is just too much for most of us to handle without letting loose fairly quickly - at least in Texas.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (6 May 2008):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

But if you stopped completely then you just wouldn't cum at all? Or would the plan be to return later?

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A male reader, oldfool Australia +, writes (6 May 2008):

oldfool agony auntStop her from giving you head and do something else. It's not easy to actually control yourself from coming. Sometimes the best thing is to move to an activity that doesn't stimulate you so much. Something that she would like, like giving her oral sex.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (6 May 2008):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

Hmm but what about lasting long and all that? That was the meant to be the focus of the question. Sorry if it was confusing.

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A male reader, DoubleM United States +, writes (6 May 2008):

DoubleM agony auntThe question is rather meandering, but I think that the answer is that you should incorporate lubrication products that are orally compatible, or in other words, consumable. Some, but not all, can provide lubrication and also taste good. My personal preference, however, is saliva if and when it is sufficient.

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