A
female
age
26-29,
*ocker_grl_96
writes:I am in love with my ex.I know right? 17 year old junior girl in high school thinking she's in love, its one big cliche. I just realized it and it scares me. It scares me. I mean we broke up because he cheated on me. With a freshman. And that was after 2 years (slightly off and on) of dating. Granted all he physically did was kiss her but that was enough to send me off the deep end after i had asked him how he felt about her, and asked him to stay away from her and all that. Anyway after we broke up he dated her for a while(like 2 months) and i forced myself to be ok with it. I pushed myself into dating my childhood friend and that didn't last long, he broke up with me, we stayed friends and moved on, then my ex(the cheating one) started having interest in this girl who happened to be in my ceramics class. I talked to both of them off and on and i kind of took things out of context and they ended up losing whatever feeling they had. After that he came back to me saying he was sorry and all that, i really thought we would give it another go. On my B-day he asked me out on a date. Just a trial thing not like bf/gf thing. I was super exited but when it came time for the date i had to cancel because of family stuff. We rescheduled but inbetween the original date and therescheduled one i saw him at school a lot (like in choir and in the halls) and he was always with this girl lets call her M. He and M were walking around seemingly flirting even though they were just friends so i got scared. thought that if we dated again he might cheat again. so when we went on our date i shut down, i acted cool and normal as if it was just a friend thing. after that i never officialy told him i rejected him but he got the hint and left me alone. Of course not to long after he and M started dating. I have known M since 2nd grade and she is really sweet (most of the time) i really have no problem with her. she even asked we first if it was ok for them to date. I didnt want to seem evil so of course i said i was fine with, and i regretted it ever since. The other day i saw him hand her a note folded in origami and i was about to cry cause it was our thing. Then at lunch M showed me the note cause it was written in code and she couldnt figure it out. it was the same code he used with me. of course that just hurt me more. and as if that wasnt enough, that same day when i got home from school "smile" by uncle kracker was on the radio. which was our song.i wanted to cry so much. I forced my self to get over it and move on again, that is until tonight. i watched a movie where a girl died of cancer and i decided to write a list of stuff about myself for ppl to know should the time come that i pass away (I am just sayin for when in general, i am not suicidal) I got to #45 before i realized all but the first 10 were about my him. And that of course is how i got here. I need help. or advice or something. i dont want to break them up but watching them is killing me slowly. M is my friend, but he was mine first technically, and i know i am a bad person for this, but i really want him back.....What should i do????? please help!!!
View related questions:
broke up, cheated on me, flirt, move on, my ex Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, TheMoonlightphoenix  +, writes (23 April 2013):
Hi I'm Moonlight and I'm suffering in a similer situation as you, I'm a year younger and I’ve know this boy for 5 years almost, I love him more than anyone and it kills because he'll never fell that way back and all he does is mess me around. Unfortunately i can’t tell you how to get over it, I'm still trying to figure that one out myself but I can give you some advice that may help to lessen the pain .1 Get rid of anything he gave you that way you've nothing to cling on to.2 I find this most helpful - get a clean notepad and whenever it hurts the most doodle, write, scribble whatever you feel like in it you might want to draw something happy or something sad whatever you feel just let it all out on the paper rather than in tears (seriously mine looks like i have a split personality disorder, half’s bright and colourful the others covered in bloodied flowers)3 Tell your closest friends all about it, then they can help you through.4 Keep busy the busier you are the less time there is to think about it.5 Find a good film/t.v/book series to preoccupy yourself with. 6 hardest part and the one thing i struggle with ADDMIT YOU DON'T NEED HIM! 7 Cliché as it sounds remember your never alone. Hope this helps, best of luck. Moonlight X
A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused  +, writes (23 April 2013):
 M asked if she could date him (good for her!) you said yes.
you can let her know that it really bothers you but you can't expect her to stop seeing him now....
do not try to be friends with him. it's over and done. sadly you will see him in school and that will hurt but time heals if you let it.
get out, be with other friends, be active, you will meet new folks and eventually this will pass.
BTW, he was mine first is a lousy reason to date someone.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (23 April 2013): You should break up with him and stop obsessing over him. He runs around with other girls, and the only reason you want him back is to stop him from seeing other girls. The thing is, he'll only cheat on you every-time you take him back. Then you go through the cycle over and over. Really???You have convinced yourself that this boy is the only one for you. He isn't. There are other boys that you should consider dating; so you can take away his power and control over you. He knows he can come and go as he pleases, because he thinks you're dumb, will always forgive him, and take him back. He doesn't like you enough to stop hurting you.You will find out how much happier you will be if you would just start seeing other boys and just concentrating on having some fun and laughs for a change. Time to end the teenage soap opera, and act just a little more mature.Girls are way more mature at your age then boys. So you have seen how boys behave if you let them get away with it.BTW, I don't like the stuff about what you want when you die. That was sort of creepy. Keep your mind out of dark places.Get out from under his thumb. He doesn't think you're brave enough or smart enough to tell him to get lost.I know it's hard to let go. You get jealous if he sees other girls. Don't you get tired of that? Boys only respect girls who respect themselves. You gain respect when you show you have the power to protect your feelings, and not take nonsense from silly guys who cheat on you.
...............................
|
