A
female
age
36-40,
*ubblegirl
writes:My boyfriend of 4 years had a great relationship with my family, they loved him. In January he went to Mexico with a group of guys and ended up cheating on me. He told me a few weeks later and we broke up. I was really upset and cried to my mom late one night. The next day she told my dad what had happened and he told me that I deserved better then Mike anyways. Last month I went out with friends and started talking to a few of Mike’s friends. They told me that he was really upset over what happened and how unhappy he has been since our break up. Later that night he showed up at the bar and the moment he saw me we walked out with tears in his eyes. When I went home that night there was a 2 page email in my inbox telling me how much he missed me and how he would turn back time if he could. I called him a few days later and we went on a date and have been seeing each other every day since. I feel so happy when I am with him. He is sweet, funny and we have so much in common it is kinda freaky. I truly believe that he is sorry and don’t think he meant to do anything to hurt me. The problem is when I told my family they were mad that I forgave him, My dad yelled at me, my mom said he wasn’t welcomed in our home and my brother threaten to beat him if he seen him around. I know I don’t need my family’s permission to date and that I am an adult who can make my own decisions but I am very close to my family and want them to get along with Mike. What can I do to show them it he made a mistake?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (20 May 2009): i know you love him but i can also see your familys side as well.
he may regret it now but at the time he had his penis into another girls vigina you did not exist. (SORRY I AM BEING TOO GRAPHIC) . TIME HEALS SO PERHAPS YOU MOVED BACK TO HIM TOO SOON. yes, he is now sorry but you also need to heal. people that cheat do not learn the first time they mess up. their loved ones take them back almost immediately and they think its ok to cheat again and the cycle continues.
if thid Mike really loves you, then tell him you want to take things SLOWLY. no use just jumoing into bed with him. then he wouldn't have learnt anuthing about love and relationships.
next time, either you go with him or he doesn't go on holiday alone. he cannot be trusted to remain faithful.
cut your family some slack, they did not cheat on you. they LOVE you. just as you easily forgave Mike it time todo the same for them.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (7 May 2009): Their just looking out for you. Your young, why must you forgive a cheater? Move on
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A
male
reader, GrimmReality  +, writes (7 May 2009):
 Uh excuse me?
I understand that you are very young, but listen to me and listen good....
Your family is right on point.
why would you even think of forgiveness...it is very overrated. If you were the one in his shoes, do you think he would be so forgiving?
This was not a mistake. Mistakes are things like making a wrong lane change.
Do you think he just happened to be walking around with his erection hanging out and tripped over a pebble and fell straight into another woman's genitals?
He was thinking of himself, and only himself. Please don't tell me at such a young age you are so willing to accept disrespect like this?
Sweety, I am harsh because I am trying to get my point across. Cheaters lie when they cheat, then they lie to cover it up, then they lie by trying to convince you that it wont happen again and they love you.
He will cheat again, that is a given. Your family is to be taken seriously and they are right.
You are young. Go out and have fun. For all those interests you and your BF share, he certainly wasn't thinking of your best interest.
The Curb...find the nearest one and drop this goof off at it.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (7 May 2009): I'm sorry , but I agree with your family. He does not deserve you. Once a cheater always a cheater. You let him get away with it once, he'll do it again and again. Have you read any of the questions on this site? You will see that the cheaters are always repeat cheaters. They swear tey will never do it again..blah blah blah...but they do.
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