A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:My boyfriend and I have been out for about nearly a year. 5 days before our one year anniversary (bf+gf) i broke up with him.he messaged me the day we broke, that once he gets his life back on track, he'll come back for me again. the reason was because he has been extremely lazy, not studying, jobless and gets up everyday at 1pm (this started after he lost his job) . finding a job in australia is not that hard, and hes not even looking, always relying on his friends to get him a job. my affections toward him was also fading away... and i was scared to become too attached to him that it would become even harder to break it off in the future. i know i am not perfect as well, failing uni, jobless too and is feeling depressed and stressed every day we,re together. He did not simplify my life, and i believe that his laziness is also dragging me down along... i believed that i could do better, i thought breaking up with him would get y life back together and everthing would go back to how it is before our relationship started. but it was not true. everyday we spend every moment with each other, and now i just feel like my heart has been emptied out. i feel so much pain and would just cry suddenly middle of the night. i would go out with my friends, clubbing , partying and everything i think about would be him. i've called him a couple of times, and he knows how i feel . ive told him how much i miss him, and how hard it is for me...and sometimes would even cry over the phone. and clearly he knows i want him back about 3 days ago, i told him i wanted to see him, and i was crying like crazy over the phone, he came to my place and we had sex....after that day, he called me at night, but he didnt mention anything about the previous day, and would always just end our conversation by saying "ill talk to you later"i feel like as if he is no longer as affectionate towards me, during our relationship, it was always him calling me, wanting to see me, and i was always in control. everytime i call him, hes always hanging with his mates, he seems to be much happier than mei dont know what i should do, i am even more lost in life, failing completely at uni, and has totally lost control of my life. i feel so much pain, so lonely, sometimes i just wanna die.i just dont know what i can do anymore, i need to fill my life with things to do, any suggestions?from what i said, can anyone tell me how he feel? and what should i do? should i tell him to get back with him or should i leave it for a while until he comes back and find me?
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female
reader, Lovehim4eva  +, writes (10 October 2010):
I have very same problem to u. First of all is he still interested in u or not? Even if hes not cant change u if u still love him. I understand about being jobless ect me n my bf r. Tho my bf started a couse second day into it he dumped me i believe its cos i texted doing college will make us c eachother less. I also believe its to do with trust aswelllike me not trusting him to do things. I miss him like crazy cos i love him like crazy. We had sex days b4 this and when i asked if u dont want me y did it happen he wpuld hardly talk about it. Id die for him n someway i need to prove that to him cos its almost been a yr for us too so advice for u is to leave him for awhile no calls no text dont see him then see wot happens. Id not mind if u can give advice to me too as to wot i could do next. Take care
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (9 October 2010): Life has taught me one rule of thumb about relationships. The only good reason to leave a relationship is over trust issues/cheating. All this other stuff like ambition and position in life, temporary joblessness, periods of ups and downs, etc... generally, they're just fluff, when it comes to the long haul with someone. The thing that makes or breaks a relationship is trust. If you have that, you are golden. You should consider yourself lucky if you had that in your relationship with him. Many many people (myself included) have not been so lucky. Patch it up with him, if you can, and try harder than ever. That will give you plenty of things to fill your time with. Pay attention to him, do nice stuff for him, etc. Unless there are other things involved in this you're not mentioning, something tells me you probably don't want to lose this guy.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (9 October 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionLOL i didnt realise how much i wrote
i guess i am just depressed
so sad and lonely =(
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