A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Hi all!I feel totally down right now. I broke up with my girlfriend yesterday over the telephone. It was like this. We had difficult times and were just starting to get to the right track again. Yesterday we talked about our problems and we had a fight. I am normally a calm person and don't anger easily, but this time I gust got furious. I told her that I am ending this right now. The problem is I don't want it to end. I love her so much and I think that I made the greatest mistake of my life. I talked to her after the things cooled off a bit and she seemed to be quite happy with the whole idea. She didn't seem sad at all. I can't tell her how I feel over the phone and she is so far away right now. It will take a couple of days for her to get back and I'm afraid that it's going to be too late. Should I call her or just leave it be and wait for her to do something. I really really love her and don't want to loose her. Please help me! What is the best thing to do right now?
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female
reader, Laura1318  +, writes (31 January 2008):
 Those problems are just temporary only. You need to look further ahead. You can tackle those problems one by one. Some problems need more time. Don't expect quick solutions to her problems. It is like a frog in the well. You need to jump and jump till you get out of that well.
Don't solve all those problems all at once. You can be there for her to solve those problems. Two heads is better than one.Tell her, one stick can break easily but if two sticks combined , it will need more force to break it.You need to unite to face those problems together.I am sure , she would welcome another's help.
When she has problems , that is the time , you stick with her like a glue.In times of troubles , only those who are beside her are her true friends. Help her but don't argue with her. Control your anger and think before you speak.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (31 January 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionAh yes I believe that too. Hope dies last they say. The thing is that my ex doesn't want me back because we had difficult times. Her parents are having problems she is having problems at school and than as a result of that we had problems in our relationship. Now she feels that we could never have made it anyway so it is best to stay apart. But I don't believe that. She tells me to stop blinding myself but my heart tells me that we would be happy again.
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A
female
reader, Laura1318 +, writes (31 January 2008):
Don't give up hope. Sometimes, they just want to punish you but in their heart, they want you to call again.Give her a few days and then call again when they are not so angry.
It is not the end yet. She is just throwing obstacles in your path or play hard to get. Don't give up easily. You need to fight for her. Mend your hurts and go for her again.
Remember to use those three little words which can open her heart for you to enter.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (30 January 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you all for your answers. She doesn't want to be with me anymore and that's the end of it. I hope that I'll talk to you some day again but now I have to heal. Thank you again!
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A
female
reader, openheart  +, writes (30 January 2008):
tell her u r sorry before it is too late. my ex broke up with me on the fone. he got back in contact after 5 years saying how sorry he was and he would do anything to have me back! only now i am engaged!if u seriously love her and think things can be sorted out tell her fast! coz it might end up being to late!good luck! x
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A
male
reader, pandueddy  +, writes (30 January 2008):
 it is better if you can use any form of communication to tell her how you feel, the early the better, I hope if she still loves you she can accept the aoplogy. Good lucky!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (30 January 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionDamn it what power do some simple words have? God damn it I want her back! And I do love her with all my heart and I tell her that as often as I can. I just don't want something so beautiful to end.
And please don't give me "other fish in the sea" answers. I know that. I am not stupid. But there is only one "fish" I want to have at the moment. And I don't care what is best in the long run I just love her too much to let go. And I really don't care if I am still young. I can get hit by a car tomorrow or die any other death and it won't matter. I just want to be with her as long as I can even if it won't be for life. I just want to spend as much time with her as possible and that's why I want her back! Please understand me!
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A
male
reader, Arkiteck  +, writes (30 January 2008):
DO NOT follow Laura's advice below me. You shouldn't tell her you love her unless you mean it and you're sure you mean it. At the same time, you may just have to chalk this one up to the game and move on. I would suggest having a conversation with her where you get to put everything out there, how you feel and such, and see where she stands. I think it has to be done face to face but if time is a factore you're going to have to do it over the phone. Now she doesn't seem like she wants to talk to you about it so you're going to have to figure out how to get the time to speak to her. Either way, if she doesn't seem to want to work it out, LEAVE IT ALONE!!! Don't pine over it and figure out new ways to get her back. Begin with your own process so you can get on with your life. The ond proverb of "....other fish in the sea" is more true now than ever.
Look, in the end, you're only 18-21 years of age, there's no way you made the mistake of your life, because you have your whole life ahead of you. The sun will still rise tommorow, and I'm sure that there are other girls out there that you can have relationships with. Just because they're not presenting themselves today doesn't mean that they're not out there. Approach the situation with a cool, realistic view. The universe has a way of balancing everything out.
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A
female
reader, Laura1318 +, writes (30 January 2008):
You forgot to say the most important words she wants to hear from you.."I LOVE YOU WITH ALL MY HEART!"
Don't forget to say that every time you talk to her.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (30 January 2008): Hi. my personal advice would be to leave her alone. The more you force yourself upon her to worse things will get. No offense, but i think you may have ruined your chances with her. But remember we learn from our mistakes. SO don't make the same mistake again.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (30 January 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI know but I was so angry I wasn't thinking about what I was saying. I called her now and told her that I want her to know that it was a mistake and if she wants me back I will be waiting for her. She just asked if that was all and I said yes and she said good night and hang up. Now I don't dare to call her again because I don't want her to thing that I am pushing her. Ah damn it I am starting understand the people that commit scuecides. but don't worrie I won't do it.
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A
female
reader, Laura1318 +, writes (30 January 2008):
You should call her as quickly as possible before she changes her mind. She is also troubled and need your confirmations. Don't wait, do it now.
Don't wait for her to call you.You need to let her know that she is your most important person in your life. Show your concern and care for her.
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