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female
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*elalouise
writes: Please Help me guys - iv need my boyfriend to love me again....Basically, we have been so in love for a long time, over3years but due to distance (countries) we;ve only been official for 10months. then i had to move away again - not to another country this time but several hours away and we saw each other once a month 4 the last 2 months. so hard, and i dont really wanna go i to details but iv been dealing with some other issues and stresses too, which have added to my insanity: but basically i told him i think we needed to break. i didn;t know what else to do - the problem wasnt actually him, but iv just been a mess. it felt wrong since i sed it to him, and iv been crying almost all day every day for the last 2 weeks. but its only been 2 weeks and iv apologised and told him im an idiot and i completely messed up. when i first told him i didnt think we could be together he was a mess, but hes sorted himself out in the last 2 weeks and turned so numb and not bothered - completely the opposite of his affectionate self. i understand his reasons for doin this - he's insecure and feels betrayed and hurt. But i dont know how to get him back to me. we intend/ed to get engaged and marry and so on, but i have been desperatey unhappy with the rest of my life, and with not seeig him, that i messed it all up. i love him, he loves me, but i need to make him see that its worth it. my point, which i havent sed to him cs i dont want to trivialize how he's feeling, is that couples go thro a hell of a lot worse than this and pull thro even stonger, so why cant he try one more time to make this work. iv told him i made a mistake, the worst in my life without a doubt, but he cant forgive me. its not as if i did anything unforgivable, i dont think. i just cant understand why if we're so in love, which i know4 a fact we are, why he cant get over this and we can try again. the situation will change as im moving back home now. please help me im going insane, and i know it sounds pathetic but i really cant function without him, it has always been this was for the 4 years we've known each other. we are supposed to be together. help me, please xxxxxxxx
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female
reader, lelalouise +, writes (9 November 2006):
lelalouise is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanku so much, i know i just need to give him time and he is either gonna come around, or not. its hard cos im not gonna call him or contact him or nething as he 'needs time', but then maybe if i dont he'll be secretly thinking - well she doent care neway!? but, on the other hand, mybe me not contacting him will make him think about me and realise that this is how itl be if we r not together, and he'll miss us talking and want to sort it out? hope so. thanks so much hun.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (9 November 2006): If you are soulmates, no distance or circumstances can break you apart, for long anyway.
Be patience and let him know that you are there for him when he is ready.
Concentrate on what you can do to be closer to him. You both need to talk it through and allow some healing time.
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