A
male
age
36-40,
*ehr
writes:ex me 4 my enin the past i had a terrible love feeling with one of my classmate and after that i believed some :- women are devils to deceit men- love is a ordinary matter that every one may face with- girls and women try to .... me (can't find the word)- i should masturbate in behalf of having good and natural sex feelingunfortunately my country have no good atmosphere about this matter and many youth's are opposing about it.now , i changed but i am too weak to do something. i want to be with one that i need, with many (or close to .. ) characteristic properties. Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (10 July 2008): Men have mean feelings towards girls, wanting to sleep with girls they don't care about just for fun. All men feel like this once in a while, and some men actually do it.
But men aren't devils because of this. This is just one part of being male. Being male can mean having a lot of other feelings towards women that are more respectful too.
The same is true for women. All women have had a few deceitful feelings towards men in their lives, and some women have a lot of these decietful feelings all the time.
But most women do not feel like this A LOT, just occasionally. Most women are respectable most of the time, just as much as most men are respectable most of the time.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (10 July 2008): Girls and women are human, too. They suffer and love and hope just like you.But you should be praised for taking the time to think about your feelings, and want to learn more so that you can find true love. A great thing for you to do to learn more about love and women is to do a lot of reading on the dearcupid site (this one). I've learned a lot and I'm an old married lady!Just do a lot of clicking around (for instance on "Followups" up at the top of the page) and read the questions that women ask and the answers that others give. Many questions may shock you, because Western conventions with respect to sex are very different. But after a month or two of reading all sorts of questions, you'll see that there are many women trying as hard to find love or stay in love. You'll read about lots of girls who are deceitful devils, and lots of girls who as faithful and true as you could wish. You'll learn a lot about how both men and women think.Also realize that the group of people writing in are those who have problems. There are a lot of people in wonderful, beautiful relationships and marriages who simply have no need to write to us. Don't lose faith before you begin. (and by the way, don't worry, masturbation in moderation is a healthy and natural thing, probably secretly practiced by most people you know)
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A
female
reader, Tisha-1  +, writes (10 July 2008):
 Hello, Mehr, I think that you have had your heart broken by a woman, and that this now makes you worry about trying to start a relationship with another woman? I appreciate you trying to write in English, it must be very difficult to try to express yourself in a foreign language.
First of all, masturbation is common and normal. Do not allow yourself to be made to feel guilty for this. No matter what people may say, what happens in the privacy of your own room is no one's business but your own. You should not feel that you need to confess this to anyone. Just keep it private.
The thing you should understand about women is that they are humans too, with the same worries and insecurities and confusion about life that you have. They want to be treated with dignity and respect, just like you want to be treated with dignity and respect.
I don't know much about your culture, I must be honest, but I am sure that if you treat a woman as you would treat a friend, you will find that you get along better with her. Let your friends and family know that you would like to meet a woman who has the characteristics you are looking for. That you are sincere in wanting a good relationship with her.
Do not think that all girls and women are trying to .... you; they are just trying to make their way in this world, the same way you are.
I hope I understood you correctly, and that my answer helps you in some way.
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A
female
reader, shandygirl +, writes (10 July 2008):
 You sound very bitter. Quit it.
Men deceive women also. There is good and bad in everyone. You will find a nice girl some day. And when you do... treat her the way You would want to be treated.
I am 53yrs old. I have been hurt by men, and I also have hurt guys in return.
Life isn't easy. But in that uneasiness, try to stay optimistic.
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