| A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: I've been in a relationship for a while now. She's coming over for the weekend. This will be the first time we'll be alone together in a private place. We've talked about being physical and we're both ready for it. I want to please her sexually. This will be my first time if things go down so I've been reading up a lot. I agree with a lot of it. I don't expect to last long as I know I'll be really excited. The catch is I'm a neat-freak, so going down on her with my fingers and mouth is freaking me out. How hygienic is it to do that? All I can think about is that she urinates from down there and how close the vaginal opening is to the anus. I'm nervous as it is and this problem over it is adding to my worry.
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oral sex, vagina Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (9 January 2018):
 You don't have to perform oral sex on each other!! You can have a fun and exciting time doing other things. You should be able to talk to each other about these sort off thing before you actually get down to it so you both know what you both want and what you both don't.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (6 January 2018): I don't want oral. Not only do I have concerns about hygeine but I also find it degrading for the woman to perform this act. I wouldn't let her do it to me. I'm trying to figure out a way to get her off. So far, the dental dam is the only thing that I hadn't thought of.Thanks!
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A
female
reader, Anonymous 123  +, writes (6 January 2018):
 First things first: Use a condom. Stay safe always. Shower together so you know that you're both clean and proceed from there.
If you want oral sex then you'll have to give it as well. Are you ok with receiving it?
Don't read stuff online and build things up in your head. Just go with the flow. No book or website can or should tell you what to do and how to do it! These are things that should come naturally to you.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie  +, writes (5 January 2018):
 Honey...
YOU pee out of your dick but I bet you would have no problem with HER putting that in her mouth, right?
If the notion of licking someone's clit, labia and outer part o the vagina - USE clingfilm as a barrier. And put a condom on when SHE is doing YOU.
Or you two can take a SHOWER together, WASH those parts on each other. (no soap INSIDE the vagina though, no need for that, water will do.)
If you are NOT ready for oral (not everyone likes it) USE your fingers! Keep then CLEAN, the nails trimmed and no snagging nail roots!
Also... The vagina is cleaner than the mouth. You probably have more germs in your mouth than she EVER will have in her private area. (same for her mouth).
When it comes to sex, DO what you are comfortable WITH. And accept that SHE should do the same.
Respect, consent and common sense.
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A
female
reader, Andie's Thoughts  +, writes (5 January 2018):
 You quite literally pee out of what would go in her mouth. I get it; I don't like the idea of oral for similar reasons, but just shower first - both of you. As for her anatomy, just take things slowly, so you don't go near her rear end.
I'd advice a condom on you when she performs oral and a dental dam (look it up) against her when you give her oral. It's more hygienic and responsible.
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