A
female
 ,
anonymous
writes:I am 18 years old and I am sooooo jealous seeing my best friend with other girls because I really really really like him. I have liked him more then just a friend since I first met him and seeing him with other girls, even ones who are just friends tears me up. I can't stand it. I can't even explain how bad it makes me feel. I seriously just can't stand it. I hate it when he talks about other girls, even more so when he admits hes interested in them. I get sooooooo incredibly jealous just seeing photos of him with his a million girl friends he has. This too makes me upset. He gets along really well with girls so its pretty dificult for me to accpept that I am only just another one of his million girl friends, nothing more.He is alaways hanging out with girls too. I have gotten to the point where I have tried to ruin his friendships with other girls (and have failed). I know that is bad and mean. But I thought it would make me feel better. And in away it did, knowing that is one less girl goign to be around him. Butttt on the other hand then he just confides in me for hours about how hurt about almost loosing some girl friends. So then i do feel guilty.What upsets me most is to see him totaly in love with this girl who has hurt him soooo badly. So badly that most of his friends hate her guts because of what she has done. She used him and lead him on and manipulated him and still leads him on despite her having a bf. My friend says he is over her, but i find that hard to believe as he has a million photos of her, all set as his background on his computer and phone, a million texts to and from her on his phone, is always spending time with her and always talks about her. I dont see how his feelings have changed from when he did like her to now. So this makes me even more upset knowing he is wasting his time on someone who doesnt like him back, when i do!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!what should i do? i dont want to feel this way. the jealousy is tearing me up. i can't stand it. i feel like such a bad person as i cant even be happy for him.
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reader, anonymous, writes (24 November 2006): Cuz it's like he's putting his effort and time into these other girls and not focussing more attention to you. I'm sure your feelings for him will go on and on and on until you either A) just tell him how u feel, or B) stop being his friend, or C) let him be and don't be where he is when he's around those girls.
You can't "not want" to feel that way. It's all a part of who you are and what you're feeling. It's like saying "I don't want to feel heat when I near a fire" - it just does.
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