A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I have been in a relationship with a wonderful man for 4 years. He is everything I have wanted except we are going through a crisis right now. I am on the fence about kids, in one way I would love to have a family, in another, I would be happy being a wonderful aunt and traveling the world. My boyfriend doesn't want children. However, after talking to his parents, they tell me he is just scared. I am unsure; he is scared; we both are young; but it is creating a huge problems right now. Do we forget about our differences until the time to settle down comes around, or do we go different ways now for fear that neither one will change? I don't want to change him and he doesn't want to change me.
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female
reader, Laura1318  +, writes (13 January 2008):
 Do what you have to do when you come to the bridge. If you love each other, just accept his views and do not contradict him.
What a man said is not forever and it can change later.We all grow and change . He may see differently somewhere down the road.
Some women have no problems , they don't ask his opinion but get pregnant anyway and then he will have to accept the situation.
There are some who do not want children , but when they see them and feel them , they love them more than gold.
You should not let such divisive issues stand in your relationship. We are all different and not the same.
When you have love , it will conquer all...
A
reader, anonymous, writes (12 January 2008): Honestly I wouldn't listen to his parents. He told you himself that he dosen't want kids and many parents just can't handle the idea of no grandkids and are willing to lie and manipulate to get them. Your boyfriend knows what he wants and dosen't want better than anyone else. Surely you trust him in other matters? When he says he loves you, when he says he can't stand a style of music, when he voices his preference on any number of things you believe him. I don't see why this would be any different.
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