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female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: i'd likfe to know what i'm doing wrong , when i give my boyfriend oral he would star hard and after like a minute he would start getting .. flacid ,he wont be orgasming or finishing just flacid . i am new at it so i know i'm not good but can i be that terrible !! .. any thoughts would be nice .
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, DoubleM  +, writes (2 December 2009):
 The following was something I wrote previously (edited) but still applies. Perhaps it will help and may give you some confidence, but realize that some guys may not respond well to fellatio (blow jobs).
First of all, a good session of fellatio does take some time when properly orchestrated, which makes it all quite enjoyable for most men. A blow job that takes a "good while" is preferable, in my opinion.
Stroke and essentially play with his exposed penis leisurely, at least until his erection is good and hard. Include fondling his scrotum alternately. All this tends to increase anticipation and tension - building up to a climatic release.
Once he seems quite aroused, as indicated by a stiff erection, position between his legs and slowly begin licking from the base to the tip, making several passes up all conveniently available sides, also occasionally paying attention to the ball sack again. There is no hurry, and while licking the shaft, also gently massage the scrotum.
Only after at least several minutes of the above, begin applying more licks around the tip (glans), especially swirling around the ridge as well as the very tip, and start adding kisses. You should probably focus around the tip for some time, but alternate back to licking strokes up and down the shaft occasionally. Again, there is no reason to hurry the enjoyment.
At some point, when he seems to be wanting to insert, begin sucking strongly on the tip, alternating with kisses and licks. Vary the action, and then start deepening the insertions into your mouth. Continue massaging the scrotum gently with one hand, while stroking the base of the shaft with the other while you bob his erection into your mouth. At this point, nothing much can go wrong as long as you keep your teeth away from the shaft as you suck the erection and continue the hand strokes. Continue to vary all the previous activities on occasion, but focus primarily on sucking the erection as deeply as you are comfortable.
You may feel his tip begin to swell a bit, his breathing will likely quicken and his trusting efforts may increase just prior to ejaculation. Do as you wish as he releases, but the most satisfaction occurs if you continue to suck throughout and continue to stroke. If he is healthy and disease-free, his sperm is nourishing for you, although it may taste bitter or salty. Many women love their man's juice. But you do not have to swallow to please. Again, in my opinion, speed is not the issue.
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