A
male
age
22-25,
anonymous
writes:I'm just going to dive in here. I'm friends with a girl that I have a crush on. She had invited me over to her house, because she wanted to show me a gift I had given here the year before, that she had just found. Then later, she has asked me to stay with her, because she wasn't comfortable with a guy friend of her'sher' s that was being too forward And might show up. Before she had gotten a little drunk, and knowing how closed we are, I explained a really bad, past experience, and why I was so tense. After my explanation she comes over, looks at me and says, "I'm glad you're still here." Then gives me a hug and a passionate kiss. Then the guys shows up, and leaves a few hours later, and lo and behold he tried to force himself on her to make-out, where she promptly pushed him away and runs inside. Then she just wanted to talk , about what happened and calm down. Then we talked some more bands and other things. And knowing about a recent suicide attempt, I told her, "I may not know of the circumstances, but I know how you feel, and I will always be here." Then i have here a hug. It's just what I'm trying to get at is I felt we made a connection that wasn't there before and one has hasn't had. I'm trying to make sure I'm picking up the vibes correctly, because I really don't want to ruin a friendship. I'm sorry that this is so long, but thank you for your time.
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (4 June 2017):
 Stick to friendship, she isn't in a good place to date - ANYONE!
She puts herself in BAD situations and relies on YOU (and probably others) to pull her out of them - like with her "male friend". You think he just randomly decided to show up and hit on her, and put his moves on her? Totally unprovoked? You don't think there had been some conversation BEFOREHAND that prompted him to do what he did?
(now I'm NOT excusing his behavior, no guy has the right to try and force himself on ANYONE) but the fact that she TOLD you beforehand that she was WORRIED about it could happen means she KNEW there was a chance, that wouldn't happen without some "backstory".
Don't be THAT naive.
She could have told him, hey "male friend" I'm not interested in you in that way and don't come over. GET lost...: SHE didn't. Instead? She got YOU to play her knight in shiny armor. So she got the DRAMA without getting "hurt" or potentially raped.
This is WHY I think you should stick to just being her friend. SHE needs REAL friends more than a BF.
She has a lot of issues she REALLY should be dealing with, but she doesn't.
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