A
male
age
41-50,
*aniel33
writes:Help! I am in really difficult situation last spring I split up with my fiance it was a bad relationship I was not appreciated at all for anything I did we just grew apart and looking back I think I had a lucky escape after that I started to back to my normal self which was going with mates clubbing and stuff..2 months ago I met a lady we was matched by a mutual friend but we had never met before, anyway we met and we clicked straightaway and we have been seeing each other every weekend since the problem I have is that she is a very private person she is a bit older than me i`m 33 she is 38 when we are together its brilliant and I have strong feelings for her but she will not tell what we are to each other, she also says she finds it easier to cut out people than let them in she was married quite some time ago.Last weekend had a brilliant time she was saying stuff like "your my georgeous" and that she wants to be with me, this week is driving me crazy she has a very busy work life which I have no problem with but something has changed we dont talk as much when we do talk its very strained not the usual flow at all she moans at me because I text her too much (4 in a day)!??! I am generous type of person I have sent flowers to her work stuff like that but I am feeling like she is going to cut me out as she says herself she finds that easy!what am I doing wrong??
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clubbing, fiance, flowers, split up, text Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (10 April 2008): Hi Hunny
Your not doing anything wrong, Because of her previous marraige which left her hurt she finds it hard to let you in as she doesnt want to set herself up for being hurt again. Her heart is closed off in some aspects sweetheart..Try not text so much and just say to her to text you if she needs to, No pressure, She is probably a very private person and deep down inside a very scared to open up one, This is why she finds it easier to cut off..Im going by myself a while back hunny after a horrible marriage and divorce I was not going to be letting my heart be broken again...I think I drove the b/f I did have round the bend not meaning to (Im nice) But just found it so hard he came on a little to strong, Many more than 4 text aday wanting more than I could give. I didnt want anything to powerfull as I wasnt ready...Just be laid back cut back on the texting and see if she gets intouch with you love..If she likes and cares for you hunny she will, Its just taking abit of time thats all..It all depends if she has done her healing from this marriage and if she was badly treated during. She is guarding herself. You can only go with the flow love and hope for the best..I hope it works out for you...TAKE CARE WITH LOVE MANDY XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
A
female
reader, Laura1318  +, writes (10 April 2008):
 Know her speed limits and do not speed.
Really listen to what she is telling you.
If you are not sure ,ask for confirmations.
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