A
female
age
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anonymous
writes:Me and my husband are retired, my husband retired in January 2020, pre-COVID, and I retired in February 2020. I'm 61 and he's 63.We have twin daughters who are 34. We live in Texas, one of the big cities there.He was a businessman who ran his own business since he was in his mid-30s, I worked in PR for 27 years until retirement.The pandemic didn't cause much work-related problems for us (obviously) and quarantine didn't have us arguing etc. since we both knew we wanted to retire and spend more time together, less time in the rat race, even though we loved what we did. Quarantine made our relationship stronger, we could spend more time gardening and other things when possible, or cooking new recipes; we didn't have the stresses of work, raising kids etc. that some people had. Not saying it in a boastful way, telling it like it is.Now restrictions are eased/easing, my husband told me about wanting to realize a dream he's had for years.He told me how he's wanted to move to Chicago, a city he's loved for years and only been to twice, and start to enjoy the city's food culture and restaurants, and visit every single restaurant and fast food joint or pizza shop in the city and then blog about it, not for the social media "likes" or anything like that, but because he genuinely enjoys food, cooking it, writing about it; he said he enjoys the social side of it and that part of it came from experience working in a burger bar in his teens, before he met me (we met when I was 23 and he was 25; I was a student, he was working in a local dive bar at the time.).He told me he's always spent hours on Chicago-related websites, reads up a lot on the restaurant and food scene there, and has friends made via Facebook and social media there who he's met once or twice here, but never there.I'm worried about the financial side of this hobby; is it an unusual retirement hobby, restaurant reviewing and blogging? Boating etc. are expensive hobbies, not that he wants to be a retiree with a boat or RV, he's not into that.He told me he doesn't want to be the stereotypical retiree and being in a retirement home, but doesn't want to go back to a full-time 9-5 job either, he said closing his business pre-COVID was the right thing to do. He said to me being a stereotypical John Doe retiree never fitted in with his personality.Financially, we're in very good health, had a few discussions with accountants to check that; we both have similar but not the same views on finances, and it's more a gray area than one thrifty, one spends loads. I'm worried about this retirement hobby partially from the financial perspective; husband also likes long walks, be it city or beach or lakeside, so obesity probably isn't that much of a concern. To him, fitness was/is never about the gym, it was about walks and cycling, he felt that was enough.He also likes to drive, and said he'd drive into Chicago center if he had to sometimes, no issue with that, hates Uber and car-sharing, very into his cars as interest.We're discussing it later this week, and I want to ensure the discussion goes well.I'm not against moving to Chicago, my husband is aware of that and very pleased, but I'm unsure of advantages and disadvantages. I do have a slight small worry, we'll be ridiculed for our accents, which are very Texan in twang, and if some people will struggle to understand us.Our town isn't a podunk one-horse middle-of-nowhere town, but it's no major city either, just a white picket-fence sort of existence, y'know, people with a sedan and SUV, kids, big TVs etc. on an avenue and a town square etc with city hall.It's not boring, but it's been good where we've lived for the past 32 years, and I'm wondering if I should seize the day with my husband.I do love him, really love him, I'm just having slight nerves and worry over if the move is a good idea.We've both only really moved twice in our lifetimes, and only within the same state; for my husband it was moving 40 miles down the road, for me 15 miles.I've been open to moving, but we've never really found anywhere and like where we are for now, but this has made me consider changing my views.I'm thinking about this retirement, not worrying about issues such as what others think, but what's best financially.Mentally, we both have good mental health, so no problems there.It's just this would be our third and probably final big move.Please can someone give us pros and cons of moving to Chicago, objectively? I've not done a lot of research because I don't know where to start on this, and am worried about misinformation, even on a topic as mundane as moving to Chicago.Anyone here live there?I'm not sure how many questions you get from retirees or on retirement here, but thought I'd ask.
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reader, anonymous, writes (17 March 2022): Well this is an unusual suggestion for retirement! The first thing that popped into my head is the cold. Maybe you guys are different but as I age I find myself feeling the cold more.If you can swing it financially, I would think winters in a warmer place would be much more pleasant.Don't forget that the overall crime rate is probably much higher in Chicago...
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (16 March 2022): When it is forty below zero outside and you are paying six hundred a month just to heat your small three thousand dollar studio apt. He will change his mind.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (14 March 2022): I'm a transplant 2000 miles from where I grew-up, and roughly 2300 miles from where I attended college. I was very young; so adapting to a new culture and lifestyle was part of the adventure. In order to live the way I wanted to live, I had to make a lot of money. My partner was a lawyer, so we had the combined-income to sustain our chosen lifestyle. We lived very well, but it's not in Chicago!
Make a pact with your husband. You are willing to give it a try; but if it causes you financial stress, becomes a burden on your marriage, or if this big endeavor falls through. You will get to choose where you will settle-down for retirement the next time. Just moving your life to another neighborhood can be a tremendous expense in the present economy; so moving your entire life to another state, particularly the "Second City," is going to be costly. Good housing is not cheap, no matter where you go!
Please forgive my frankness. He's too old to deal with the tumultuous condition of the city of Chicago as it is in the present.
It's not all about the glamour of restaurants and leisurely-living. You didn't indicate that you're a wealthy couple, or I doubt you would have written DC. It's about crime, severe winters, and you better be financially-secure enough to face the economic rollercoaster of our modern times. You need to be in your best of health. Know what the cost of medical-care and assisted-living could be like in the future. You are growing older, not younger. Not everyone has to move to Florida or Arizona; but moving to any major city is not going to be easy for a retired-couple. The latest statistics show Illinois is 8.7% more expensive than Texas. Our economy changes by the day!
I had a friend move lock, stock, and barrel to Hawaii. On a teacher's salary!!! Sold his house, and most of his belongings. He's estranged from his wealthy parents, because he was gay. They warned him, as did I, and our other friends. He was back in two years! His parents paid for the move. He lived there in a basic shack! Too ashamed to invite any of us to come visit him. He thought he could handle the cost of living! He forgot mom and dad paid for their vacations in the past! He was in his mid-40's!
I think your husband is thinking with a "vacationer's mentality;" and can only see things through tunnel-vision. He isn't considering the impact this is going to have on you, your income, your health, and your lives. Unless you are financially-secure enough to live in the suburbs, or a luxury high-rise in the city; maybe that's where you can enjoy a safer and better quality of life. Still, we're talking about Chicago!!! You might need to talk with a financial-planner; and get an analysis of the cost of living, your projected income, and review your assets and investments for the long-run. Being a businessman, he'll know why I've suggested this.
I personally believe he's making a huge mistake, as far as timing goes. Telling you this doesn't help, because he's at that age that it's hard to change his mind; and it all depends on how much he respects your opinions about things. If you've always handed him the reins and followed his lead; it's too late in life, and in your marriage, to come looking for advice he'll never listen to anyway. You wouldn't be able to implement any advice to dissuade his plans; if he never listens to you, and your marriage is entirely built on his running the show.
Pray on it. Ask God for guidance, and get as many people on your side as you can to convince him he should plan this big event in your lives with great precision. There must be a Plan B, C, and D!!! It is too great of a move to go into it with your eyes closed. He's not in his 20s or 30s; and your lifestyle heavily depends on the income you have to sustain it. This will profoundly impact your marriage.
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A
male
reader, Fatherly Advice +, writes (14 March 2022):
 Good theatre.
Highest rate of gun crime in the US.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (14 March 2022):
 Well, as someone who lived in Louisiana for 10 years then moved to Michigan- It was definitely going from the frying pan to the freezer.
To be VERY honest here, I absolutely LOVE that MI has seasons, but... winter is 5-6 months long. Spring a month, Summer 3-4 months, and Fall 1-2. I HATE winter.
I have been to Chicago a few times, it's OK. Driving there though is more like aggressive bumper cars than anything else. And in the winter? Much worse. Many drivers in MI (and IL) think that because they are born up here they automatically know how to drive in snow and ice, and they don't.
There is a lot of opportunities for boating, going to the beach, zoo, parks, and traveling around the state (and neighboring states - ferry to MI or WI. Plenty of things to do and see.
As far as the cost of living, I am not sure. It did seem a bit more expensive (but not much) compared to MI, and MI was a LOT more expensive than LA (Louisiana).
If you two have NOT visited in winter, then maybe that is a consideration before you move. Visit a few times at different seasons. THAT would be my best advice.
Would I want to live there? No.
"2021 ends as Chicago’s deadliest year in a quarter century"
Yeah, that is not for me.
But I am not a "big city girl" at heart. I have lived in London, Copenhagen, Frankfurt and enjoyed them thoroughly, but they are all "SMALL" big cities compared and many many times safer (even if the bombing back in the 1990's of London... that says a lot.) I find Chicago dirty and badly laid out. Driving there is a nightmare (as mentioned earlier).
Personally, I'm not a fan. But you might like it :)
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