A
female
 ,
anonymous
writes:hi, my bf and have been together 5 years, i am 18 and he is 24, there is this girl we both know , he is more friends with her and has more in common with her that what i do, which is ok, the thing is i find it hard to make converstation with her as we have nothing in common and when we make conversation its always about the same stuff i always feel like im repaeating myself, anyway i find it less appealing to go visit her on a regular bases as it gets boring for me, i told my bf this and he totally didnt listen and now he acuses me of not liking her at all, which is not the case at all, i do like her i just dont have anyhting in common with her, but my bf thinks i dis like her and and always trys to start fights about it, yet he has said the same thing about anther person we are friends with that he does not have much in common with and he often uses that reason not to go visit that other person, i dont acuse him of disliking her or make him feel bad about it, am i wrong to feel hurt by my bf for causing fights over this? and is right to use that reason not to visit a person that he has less in common with but i cant use that same reason? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, kellyO  +, writes (25 October 2006):
 Perhaps this is just a simple misuderstanding and u should try clarify things with your boyfriend. Tell him what u wrote here that seeing her on a regular basis isnt appealling to you since both of u have nothing in common and u feel uncomfortable repeating the same discussions. This doesnt mean u wont see her at all but just not regularly. Also, you dont have to indicate that he does the same with a friend of yours too because it will make him feel that it might be the reason why u intend not to see his friend, which basically means to get back at him.
I think both of u should reach a compromise and go visit each other friends at least once in a while at a fixed period u find comfortable doing. It doesnt have to be a regular basis if u guys arent comfortable with them.
Goodluck
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