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female
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anonymous
writes:HaPpy Easter guys...I dunno how to begin or wht 2 say cos actually am all messed up! I feel so lonely cos am single and ppl around me r all couples, I've had 2 relationships in my life and they were quite recent and both of them ended badly I was so in love with them and I gave em everything and eventually they were just not worth it, they were simply bad! all I can say is that I probably dont know how 2 choose right cos at 1st I think they're angels and then by time their other side stars 2 appear until everythin gets messy and till now am still in love with them thou they've cut any contact what so ever.Recently I started 2 like a guy with me at work, we went out alone 2 times only, and other than that I c him at work but v rarely...cos we're in the begining I don't know his flaws yet, however I dont understand him, he implies that he likes me sometimes and keeps asking questions that really show that he's interested and it's quiet obvious, however he hasnt said anything out loud, and I've known him for like 5 months now or so and we've only gone out twice, the good thing is last time which was 3 weeks ago he kept telling me all bout his parents n personal stuff while the 1st time he was telling me all about his ex.the thing is he's v slow, he'd talk n it's all fine oneday then it's like he forgets about me..I think maybe he's havin a hard time cos his ex is getting married these days but still I try 2 get close but say I call and he doesnt answer or stuff like that...I want 2 do something 2 make him realize I'd b there for him, yet again I could give up all that and just settle 4 the fact that am alone...maybe am meant to be single cos I've had 2 chances in love and I blew em up, so maybe I dont deserve this guy's love...he's really worth trying for him, but am just powerless, one day I keep thinking bout my ex and start 2 think that I want him back, then another day I start to hate my ex's and blame them 4 what I am now...and sometimes I think I need love 2 fix my life...I dunno!! am turning 23 in Sept. and my parents keep talkin bout how they wish I'd get married to a nice pretty guy and stuff like that, cos most of my cousins have got engaged or married recently!thnx 4 hearing me out! :(
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reader, anonymous, writes (10 April 2007): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthank u so much guys :) I'll reconsider what u've said...
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male
reader, ChiRaven  +, writes (10 April 2007):
 First, DO NOT let your parents pressure you into jumping into something that you are not ready for. And believe me, you are NOT ready to get married. You are not your cousins, you are you.
Next, don't worry too much about having had a couple of bad relationships. You don't always land the right guy the first time you try, or the second or the third. You're at a time of life when you SHOULD be getting to know some different guys, and trying to find out just what you want in a guy that you might want to settle down with. Getting to know a person who might be your partner for life can be a slow process. Take your time and do it right.
But try to learn from your experiences. Think HARD about your two ex's. What was there about them that you found good in the first place? How did that fool you? What went wrong that caused you to break up with them? What part of that were you responsible for? What part were they responsible for. And be HONEST about who was responsible for what ... you can't cheat yourself.
This guy at work. Maybe he'll come around, and maybe he won't. But you should concentrate on being your own person regardless. Get to know yourself. Get to like yourself. Then you can be more confident as a partner to whoever you finally do find to be with you, whether it's him or somebody else.
And don't even think about giving up on yourself yet. You're just getting started.
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male
reader, 2old4this +, writes (10 April 2007):
 Guess what? You are still plenty young. My advice is to just take some time off from relationships. Even a year wouldnt be bad. Go out with your friends and have fun. Meet new guys, but try not to sleep around. Eventually you'll meet a nice guy to take it slow with. If its that guy from work, he will still like you later.
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