A
female
age
30-35,
*ugar_1990
writes:I'm 20 years old... Almost 3 years ago I was in high school. I was in last grade (in Greece we're giving exams to enter a university) and I needed a private tutor in maths... So I started having lessons with a guy 45-50 years old (his appearance is very good, he's very athletic and he's got very beautiful eyes)... In the beginning, I didn't want to realise what was happening to me... I didn't want to admit that I'm starting to falling in love with him... However, during our private lessons in his place I realised that I want him... As for him, he showed me that he wanted me too... He was telling me that I'm beautiful... He was touching my hand while I was solving problems... In general, he did things, lots of thing, that showed me that he wanted me back... We finished our lessons after a year and I successfully passed the examination. The next year I was a student in Economic School and in the first two semesters I had maths... So, I called him to see whether he could help me again... He said yes, of course..... But, I couldn't show him how I feel... He knew nothing about my feelings... So we finished our lessons again... And now, almost one year later, I can't forget about it. He isn' married or something... I know that it's difficult to have a normal relationship because of his age... But I want to be with him... For a while at least... Please help me.... I'm so confused..!Thank you in advance..!
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female
reader, sugar_1990 +, writes (23 September 2011):
sugar_1990 is verified as being by the original poster of the question? have to thank you very much for your help... I will try to contact him... I don't want him to take it in the wrong way... I will be ashamed... So, I hope I find the courage to call him and see if he can help me again....
A
male
reader, The Realist  +, writes (23 September 2011):
 I would give him a call and see if he can help you. If he is a math guy he may be limited in his statistics since they are two different fields although they seem so similar. It shouldn't be too awkward to call him to ask and maybe if he can't help he knows someone good who can. At least you can trust his advice.
Check with him and see what he says. Chances are he knows stats in some way where he can help.
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A
female
reader, sugar_1990 +, writes (22 September 2011):
sugar_1990 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI don't believe that I will be distracted... I think that I'm going to try harder in order to pass the exams... However, I don't know how to approach him and ask him to help me again... Call him?? I don't know... Also, I'm not sure if mathematicians can teach statistics... Do you know something about that? Should I find an expert in staticics or mathematicians can teach statistics? Thank you very much!
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A
female
reader, sugar_1990 +, writes (22 September 2011):
sugar_1990 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI don't believe that I will be distracted... I think that I'm going to try harder in order to pass the exams... However, I don't know how to approach him and ask him to help me again... Call him?? I don't know... Also, I'm not sure if mathematicians can teach statistics... Do you know something about that? Should I find an expert in staticics or mathematicians can teach statistics? Thank you very much!
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A
male
reader, The Realist +, writes (22 September 2011):
I think that if you get past wanting to be with him it would be good to have his help again. I say this because he has been good at helping you before and finding a new tutor for high level courses may be difficult. I would stick with him but you have to consider the distraction factor of him too.
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A
female
reader, sugar_1990 +, writes (22 September 2011):
sugar_1990 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI thank you very much for your help... I'm telling myself that I have to forget about him... But it happened 3 years ago, and even now I keep thinking about him...
As I'm graduating in a few months I want to enter to a MBA course and I have to give exams in Statistics... Here's the dillema... Should I ask from him to help me with Statistics again or should I find someone else? What do you suggest me?
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (22 September 2011): being on the other side of the coin... as a 27 year old female college professor I have found myself being fancied by older/ slightly younger college students who I inevitable started to fancy myself esp. if one was incredibly smart and serious about their work. the thing though thats helped me avoid precarious situations is the fact that i know if i pursued it, it would be to my demise as it is not only unethical [for me at least] but it will never work in the long run. I think your tutor... even though he might like you a lot... he knows deep down that it is merely a crush... that could never survive in the real world mainly because of the significant age difference. I think that to get him out of your system ... you need to talk to him about it. if he's brave enough, he will be straightforward with you and let you know it would never work but you can still be friends etc. most likely, however, he will just cut off all communication with you.. as his way of saying... no!!! its a tough one... but good luck!
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A
male
reader, The Realist +, writes (22 September 2011):
I think that this is a crush that has developed because he helped you trough a tough time. I am not saying he doesn't care for you but there is a good chance that you are miss reading his signals. If you were frustrated with math he may have been trying to calm you down and you took it the wrong way. It is probably best to leave it as a crush and fantasy rather then pursuing a relationship.
Say he was interested, where would you go from there? You may be able to sneak around for a bit but there would be a lot of drama when people started to find out. The problems you would face would be quite large especially when you are saying it would only be for a while. I'm not judging you here nor would I if you dated him but looking long term he is going to start to age rapidly compared to you.
You could even talk to him about this and see what he has to say which may help you understand that the fantasy is far better then the reality of the situation.
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A
female
reader, sugar_1990 +, writes (22 September 2011):
sugar_1990 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionPlease!!! Help me!!!
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