A
female
age
41-50,
*. tay
writes:I am a 30 year old woman, I am attracted to another woman at work. It is a very awkward situation. How can I find out if she is the same way without letting on?
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reader, anonymous, writes (23 May 2008): I am in my 40's and I have asituation where I didnt know if she was attracted to me as I was a for her. One night after going out, we kissed.WOW! That was it! We wanted to remain friends and we ignore the subject yet Im still falling for her, cant help it. I guess that we flirted, exchanged glances with each other for so long the feelings are real but rather that get hurt we silently decided to stay as we were before the kiss.
A
female
reader, Transmitter_Girl  +, writes (18 May 2008):
I am in exactly the same situation and I know it hurts. Is there anything that she does for you or says to you different to anyone else? Do you notice if she is watching you? Any other advice from others would be great. Let us know what happens XX
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A
male
reader, honeyross +, writes (18 May 2008):
 The best way is to try to make friends with her because in this way you can learn more about her lifestyle and whether she has a boyfriend, etc. The tricky thing is you'd have to be careful not to disclose too many details about your own life otherwise she could feel uncomfortable.
You could invite her out for coffee and chat generally. It's best to assume she's straight from the beginning and not get your hopes up. You'd most likely have to keep your true feelings to yourself (nothing wrong with this - everyone has to do it whether they're old or young, gay or straight).
It's worth getting to know her a bit better - at least you'd know for sure either way.
Worst case scenario - she's not interested and you start falling in love with her. In this case you'd have to stop seeing her for a while to stop your feelings developing. Even with this possible worst-case, it's maybe better knowing it's not going to work than not giving it a try.
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