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male
age
36-40,
*hateme
writes: i am a very controlling boyfriend and i want to change so bad but its really hard for me. i love my girlfriend and i want to spend the rest of my life with her but i have been trying to change for two months now but i just cant change. i really want to and if i dont i know i will lose her.is there any any one that can please help me!!!!!!!! i hate what i am. please dont think of me as a bad guy cuz i really wanna changesome one please help me Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, vina_101  +, writes (18 December 2006):
 First you have to think about all the reasons as to why you are a control freak. What are you afraid of? What is causing you to be this way? When you are not in control what's the worst that could happen? Then deliberately put yourself in that situation and see how you cope. Face the fear and keep doing it until you get used to it and it's not such a big deal anymore. When you are in a situation where you are not in control keep telling yourself: "It's ok. It's fine. Everything is going ok." Keep saying it until you start believing it.
This problem is all in your mind and that's what you have to change first and everything else will follow. This is a problem that only you can solve so the advise I can give or that anyone can give you now is vey limited but I hope it helps.
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