A
male
age
36-40,
*irus
writes:Please don't hate me or judge me for what am going to ask, I just wanna know WHY!!Ok, I am a 23 year old guy who adores women in general and just love to give them what they desire and need. That's not the problem though, I find myself only attracted either to older women, or my friend's girlfriends. I am not worried about the older women attraction now, but the other one. I know it sounds sick but it's the truth and I hid it till this moment. I swear I intend no harm to any human being, but I don't get interested in my friend's gf's until I see an unsatisfied desire and dreams in their eyes, I am not an angel but it just kills my heart when I see a female in such a situation and I look at the other side to find my jerky friend laughing and ignoring her needs. WHAT? WHY? HOW? dunno just talk to me please. Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Fairy Godmother  +, writes (12 January 2009):
 I don't know if my reply might help you and please forgive me if I sound a little blunt, but here goes...
Firstly, why do you presume you know what any woman desires and needs if you don't really know her? The only way any of us can know someone's true needs and desires is by getting to know them really well, and I don't see how you can be doing that if the women in question are not with you but with someone else? You might think you know what they want and you might believe you see dissatisfaction in their eyes but it doesn't automatically follow that you are somehow the answer to all their problems.
Lots of women (and men) are in troubled or less than happy relationships, or have areas of their lives that leave them feeling dissatisfied but it doesn't automatically follow that they are looking for or indeed want a man to 'rescue' them. We are all, or we should be, masters of our own lives and it is down to each of us as individuals to decide whether to mend or leave a troubled relationship and to take control of our lives to give them the fulfillment and purpose we long for. No-one else can do that for us!
It's horrible to see someone (man or woman) in a relationship that appears to be less than happy and disrespectful but none of us really knows what goes on in a relationship except the two people involved. It doesn't automatically follow that by being with you these women would be any happier. It sounds as though you want to be a knight in shining armour to lots of women you presume need rescuing but who are in fact perfectly capable of making their own decisions and getting themselves out of situations they don't want to be in.
There is a sort of safety for you in being to drawn to women who are already in a relationship but this won't bring you happiness. May I suggest that your love, caring and compassion are channelled towards someone who is not in a relationship and is free to show you all those things in return? They are lovely qualities but I think you are not using them wisely. They are many many women out there who are single and have perhaps come out of an unhappy relationship who would long for someone like you to show true friendship and care for them. I think you just need to direct your emotions towards a woman who is willing and able to reciprocate and not at your mate's girlfriends.
I hope this helps and good luck!
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