A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Hi, I am in love with my current girlfriend and we have been together for a little over a year, i went out with some friends and got really drunk, i ended up dancing with this girl, normal flirting, and at the end of the night i almost kissed her, she told me that she wanted to but that i had a girlfriend. when she said that, my drunkiness came crashing down, and i realized what i did. It has been bothering the hell out of me. We didnt do anything except almost kiss. and its been eating me up if i should tell her? I want her to trust me and i dont want to ruin what i have with her. However i feel like im not being honest. (she does know that we went to a bar, and i did tell her i danced with her) do i have to go in more detail? i learned a lesson and i really dont want to be with anyone but the girl im with now.. help!
View related questions:
drunk, flirt Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, ocrapwhatido +, writes (22 August 2007):
the problem and guilt im feeling is that i went in foe the kiss, and if she didn't mention that i had a girl then nothing would have stopped me, on top of that i know i shouldn't have even been in that situation, im really disappointed at myself for being so stupid.. so even though i tried to kiss the other girl and didnt, should i still not say anything? I was under the impression that trying is just as bad as it actually happening since i was the one who initatied it.
A
female
reader, smeedle +, writes (22 August 2007):
 Put it behind you and move on, you only thought about it, you did not do it and that is the main thing. Carry on with your life and with your girlfriend, it means nothing, we are all attracted to other people from time to time, and this is normal it is what we do about that attraction that matters and you did the right thing so stop beating yourself up.
...............................
A
male
reader, Jamer70 +, writes (22 August 2007):
 Well i say dont tell her and chalk this up to experience and learn to control your drinking and what you do if you do drink, you say you learnt a lesson, which hopefully will stay for life and since you didnt kiss her thats enough.
Though if you want to be honest you can tell her and risk her wrath(depending on what her personality is like) and plead that youve learnt you lesson, and promise to remain 100% commited
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (22 August 2007): It is normal for these things to happen if you are under the influence of alcohol. It is a good thing that you realized that it was wrong and that you truly do love your girlfriend. Nothing happened between the two of you, there is no need to tell your girlfriend. The only thing that you will establish by telling her (believe it or not) is broken trust and feelings of inadequacy. Don't let the guilt eat you up, we all make mistakes but the important thing is that you don't repeat them. Learn from your experience. If you tell her....it might all go down hill from there even if she forgives you she will never forget it. Trust me, I am a woman and although I am very loving and understanding person....if my boyfriend confessed that to me...there would be a lot of hurt feelings and broken trust. I hope my answer has helped you. Another thing, perhaps you should do something really nice for your girlfriend, not out of guilt but out of appreciation for her. Good luck!
...............................
A
male
reader, Freespirit27  +, writes (22 August 2007):
You will never last in any relationship if you feel guilty about doing nothing. You have a girlfriend. You will later maybe marry. You are no value to your girlfriend or wife if you cannot flirt or be attractive to other women occasionally. You also need confirmation too that you are attractive. You can do this without sleeping with someone or even kissing them. We all lust occasionally after someone else... it is healthy. The key is not giving in.
...............................
A
female
reader, girlwhoneedshelp +, writes (22 August 2007):
 No you don't tell her. It's like saying " I almost climbed Everest" but I didn't actually climb it, so what's the point in mentioning at all? It will only upset her that it was an almost but I'm sure she would be more pleased to here that than "we did kiss". Keep quiet!
...............................
A
female
reader, zina  +, writes (22 August 2007):
 yes u tell her
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (22 August 2007): iv been in that situation as well. i never told my boyfriend. i no it sounds reli reli horrible. i was the same it ate me up inside bt i dnt regret it. if i tell him, hed dump me and never trust me agen. even if the reason is to say that i didnt. that 'almost' is vital, it still means u 'thot' about it, even if u were too drunk to think str8. trust me, she wont thank u for it. as long as u learn from your mistake and never do it again.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (22 August 2007): Hi, it sounds like you really love your currant gf. I'm gonna say both parts of what you can do. You could be honest with her and if she loves you too, she'll forgive you and appriciate your honesty. Or you can not tell her, and try to move on, but if it keeps bugging you then you need to tell her. And if you do tell her you need to tell her all the things you posted, like how you don't want to be with anyone else but her. Good luck x
...............................
|
