A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:My Husband wants to experience threesome..... My husband is been forcing me or convincing me to go for threesome with him. His fantasy is to see with with a girl. He wants me to be lesbian and make out with a any girl. I am not just not comfortable with this idea and dont know how to deal with the situation..Several times i have tried to explain him that i am not cut for this but he doesnt seem to be understanding.Is it normal to have such fantacies??? Should i try this for his sake???? Dont know what to do??????
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, jaks  +, writes (1 October 2009):
Fantasy has no limit. You should go only if it interest you, else it will be a big disaster. Take care. Jaks
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (20 April 2009): Hi
If you'd like to get your point across, why don't you ask him how he would feel if you were asking the same of him with another man. I'm gay, but I can totally understand that if you are not attracted to a particular sex, you arent' atrracted to them and you shouldn't be expected to do anything that makes you uncomfortable in any way. Your husband should respect that, and put your discomfort before his desires.
This fantasy is quite common amongst straight men, and fantasies are healthy. They become unhealthy when you try and force/coerce an unwilling participant into helping you play them out.
You should never do anything if you feel you are being forced/coerced and have every right to say no. Your husband will just have to accept that and if he doesn't, you should question his respect for you, your opinions, and your feelings.
Hope this helps.
Warm regards
www.gaygirlsguide.co.uk
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (20 April 2009): Just laugh it off and say that you're not interested, you have to have a sense of humour sometimes.
Your husband may have been influenced by Katy Perry's I Kissed A Girl and the controversy surrounding it (which did spur on men's fantasies, according to a relationship show on a British radio station!)
Seriously, don't do anything that you're not comfortable with, just try and find something you're BOTH comfortable with. Threesomes NEVER work, so don't go there!
I was once offered a threesome by two girls who knew me, I thankfully declined it - knowing that nothing positive could, or would, ever come of it.
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A
female
reader, Audrina  +, writes (20 April 2009):
if after much consideration you agree to go ahead with it then its advisable to put strick ground rules to the situation, like he doesn't touch the other party or no kissing etc.
yes i agree with most of the answers. You can never undo what is done, if u feel uncomfortable now imagine what this could open the door for in the future. Its a bit like legalised cheating??
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A
female
reader, littletigle11  +, writes (20 April 2009):
 It's normal for men to have fantacies, of course. I personally think if you don't want to, don't. Simple.
It can't always be him him him.
Takes two to tango and three's a crowd.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (20 April 2009): Agree with Tellulah, sauce for the goose is sauce for the gander....(of course if he says yes, then its a little trickier to back out - make him go first)
If you don't want to do then the answer is NO. You shouldn't just be doing it to keep him happy. He loves you and should respect your wishes.
Hugs, Star.x.
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A
female
reader, eyeswideopen  +, writes (20 April 2009):
 My feelings exactly Tellulah! Your husband would change his tune pretty damn fast if you mention another male in the the sack with both of you! Tell him it stays a fantasy, period, over and out.
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A
female
reader, TELLULAH +, writes (20 April 2009):
 Oh, blah! blah! blah!, (not you, your husband)
Why do men want this so much? Do us lady's dream of seeing our men done up the pooh box by another man.
Tell him to sod off, and you dont want to do it. Or you will, if you can do a threesome with another guy besides him.
Well its still a threesome, bet he wont fancy that though.
My ex used to go on about this all the time, till I said I had a dirty dream of him being done up the backside and sceaming like a bitch.
He never mentioned it again, funny that eh!
XX
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