A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Dear cupidI come from a country that was colonized by British some 100 years ago, so growing up we use a lot of British words without even knowing the literal meaning of it and English is not my primary language.My husband of 5 years is from a country where English is his primary language and he only knows English, but I can speak 3 languages fluently and understand 5 languages. He always nitpicks my English , sometimes even without realizing I use British word for something and he Immediately starts commenting how incorrect that is .... It's really frustrating , I tried to explain so many times I cannot just forget the way I grow up or certain way of saying things, he does not care . He never even tried to learn my language I am not even sure how to make him understand , I know this is really a stupid argument,but I unable to get over it. Thanks for reading Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (5 June 2022):
 Does he speak anything but English?
If not, tell him to shove it.
Or if he does (and you speak the same language too) nitpick him until he understands how annoying it is.
Now. IF he is nitpicking to help you sound better or articulate yourself better then TELL him to do it in a manner that is actually HELPFUL because nitpicking isn't.
" I tried to explain so many times I cannot just forget the way I grow up or certain way of saying things, he does not care "
Well, you CAN retrain yourself to change how you use language. IF you wish it. You don't. He does. What I would explain to him is THIS is part of you. How you are and how you talk. That you are not going to change it because you don't WANT to. So he can keep his comments to himself.
English is my third language. My kids correct me on RARE occasions. Doesn't bother me one bit. My husband doesn't, anymore. But he did in the beginning until I told him he could "correct me" when he spoke Danish fluently.
It is a stupid argument. But it's more than that. This is PART of your culture. He needs to accept that. He needs to accept YOU for you.
If he keeps doing it, no matter what. Roll your eyes, shrug your shoulder and move on. It's really not worth a fight.
chin up!
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