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age
51-59,
anonymous
writes: Is it normal for a man to be looking at a porn sight which focuses on other adults rating videos posted in of them having sex with their wives (it is actually called something that is about rating wives) when he has only been married less than a year?? He also told his daughter he married his wife as he was lonely because his mum died (six monthes before he narried wife) and his dad had died a couple of years previous to his mum. And lastly he was thirty five when he married and had never seemingly been committed to relationships before!!Thanks and all advice welcome x
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (7 January 2010): If hes rating people, it must just be a part of their game, like a competion to see who can do it better. It shows the extremes they will go to for an extra thrill once `ordinary` porn is no longer enough and becomes boring. You seem very broad minded about him watching porn, so i cant understand why the thought of him rating couples freaks you out. As for him advertising himself out to other men and women for sex before he married. That doesnt sound very good. A word of advice. If he works away a lot make him have regular std checks
A
reader, anonymous, writes (6 January 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionwell i do agree that men do like looking at porn whether they are in a relationship or not, but this sight he has registered onto is about real life couples having sex and then they get the person watching to rate thier performance. Why go through the hassle of joining a sight to do that when he could just watch porn? Lastly prior to getting married he was on a sight where he advertised himself looking for sexual partners to indulge in threesomes, including men, so am i worrying over nothing?? thanks x
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (5 January 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionhiya, he works away a lot and wife is not aware of his looking at this sight. not his first serious relationship, he had a daughter at twenty four but didnt commit, his reason, he wasnt ready to be a dad. since then been in and out of relationships, split up with last supposedly serious one three months prior to getting together with his now wife who he married within months of his mum dying. so it is normal for someonew ho has just got married to be watching other married couples on a site having sex then?? thanks x
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A
male
reader, LazyGuy  +, writes (5 January 2010):
 Normal? What is normal?
I think you are asking the wrong question.
A marriage is two people agreeing to go forward in live together according to a set of rules that they create. What those rules are are different for every couple.
Some partners stay away for years for work, other couples agree to never spend a night apart.
Some are sex-workers and yet stay 'faithful' by their own definition.
What is it that YOU want out of this marriage and can you make this work with your partner. A lot of people forget that in a long term relationship you need this basic agreement to make things work. Passion/love/lust is enough for a one night stand. Marriage requires compromise and agreement.
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A
male
reader, called Steve  +, writes (5 January 2010):
 As sad as it is - people sometimes commit to marriage without actually getting to grips with whom they really are, which is what it seems this guy has.He probably just felt it was the right thing to do and found a woman who; what sounds like, was in a similar situation.All little time alone and with someone unrelated to talk to is probably a good idea for him and her, clear the air a little.The Porn issue is a Red Herring, there are far more pressing issues in play here - tho it will need addressing at some time soon!Steve
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (5 January 2010): Hi. Porn is porn, whether its rating other couples or what not. Its still porn and obviously a hobby of his. Those who like it will watch it whether they are married or not, its not something people ONLY do if they are single or have been in a relationship for a certain length of time. And it seems relatively normal for more people to watch it now its so readily available.Im not sure why you mention that he only married because he was lonely or the fact that it seems to be his first serious relationship. ?
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (5 January 2010):
The thing that says more that anything is that he married because of loneliness. He doesn't' have that all great a track record, and he's now looking at porn as well. I think whoever is married to him needs to sit down and have an honest talk with him.
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