A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:For various different reasons me and my Hubby have been having problems for the past 3 months, we've been to counselling b4 and it didn't help our situation, so he won't try againBasically the problem is whilst I don't believe he's cheated on me, he secrectly emails/texts different women..I recently caught him lying about where he'd been one night and it turned out he'd taken a female friend/collegue out for dinner, I called her and she was cross with him cause he'd told her I knew about it, she confirmed they just talked and is not interested in him...after that I Told him to leave and he's refusing saying he's staying for our daughter (he already lost his 2 kids from 1st marriage due to his cheating) he's saying he won't be apart from out daughter (she's a real daddys girl) she and he are very close, I know she would rather be with him, but as a mother I can't bear to spend even 1 night without her... Living with him is a living hell, I feel he's pushing me to leave so he can tell people I left and won't seem like the nasty piece of work twice for leaving another family due to his cheating!! I'm a good person and all our family say he's out if order but if I leave, I'll be losing my daughter and I can't bear it if I stay he treats me like dirt and plays mind games and generally disrespects me... Please help me
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (25 October 2010): Agree with the first poster, get a counselor. You also need to get a lawyer to advise you as the child may become an area of contention.
I've seen this personally, in my own family, with a brother who cheated repeatedly then tried to take the children with him as he left the marriage. Really, you need to protect yourself.
A
female
reader, Aunty BimBim  +, writes (25 October 2010):
 Go to counselling on your own, you dont have to take him along, your counsellor should be able to help you develop some strategies to deal with this issue.
YOur daughter is not superglued to the house, if you leave take her with you. If your family all agree he is out of order maybe one of them will step up to the plate and let him know what's what!
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