A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:hi im hoping you can give me your views as im a little confussed and to be honest feel a bit cheated, can anyone give me there views how would you feel and what would you do and say if you found out your boyfriend was wanking behind your back whilst your asleep down stairs Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (11 July 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthanks for your help,i have spoken to my boyfriend about it and asked him seriously if hes completely happy in everything we do in our sex life ect he said there was no problems there, at first he lied about doing it maybe because he thought id feel i wasnt good enough, i dont know but we have discussed it and he said if it didbother me we could do it together, the only let down was that he lied about this
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (8 July 2010): I wouldn't care, I mean, why would I? If I would rather be asleep than have sex with my boyfriend then why shouldn't he masturbate? If he isn't getting as much sex as he wants then masturbation is a good form of release. It is certainly NOT cheating in anyway. And it isn't behind your back if you were off doing something else (sleeping).
I wouldn't do or say anything, especially at your age. This post seems a bit immature to me. I don't suppose you're the one who found the socks are you? To be honest, if you bring this up with him, I think it will make you seem ignorant and childish, while at the same time probably embarassing your boyfriend for absolutely no good reason.
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A
female
reader, SirenaBlusera  +, writes (8 July 2010):
 I don't think he realized you'd be hurt. All guys wank!
I'm just curious, though.
How did you find out that he was wanking while you were asleep?
Men need that stimulation but it's not cheating or unfaithful when it's his own body; that's always been a part of him!
I wouldn't be worried if I had a boyfriend who liked a little "pocket pool" as long as I was the only GIRL in his life!! :) It's okay when it's confined to his own body.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (8 July 2010): hahaha....all men do that....trust me, even your father. Also, all men watch porn, don't be surprised.
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A
female
reader, Tisha-1  +, writes (8 July 2010):
 Whatever my man chooses to do with himself (solo) within the privacy of our home is entirely his business. I don't "own" his body, his sexuality or his fantasies. He's a grown man, who is entitled to his privacy. Just as I'm entitled to mine.
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reader, anonymous, writes (8 July 2010): If you were asleep downstairs, and he was upstairs, how can he have been 'wanking behind your back'? In order for him to be behind your back he would have had to be in the same room.
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A
male
reader, Yos  +, writes (7 July 2010):
 It's very normal. It doesn't mean he's not sexually interested in you. Sometimes a guy just needs to... wank. It happens and it's no more complex than being hungry or needing to scratch an itch. As a guy I can tell you it can be damn inconvenient, especially when it happens in the middle of a business meeting, or at the start of a long day when it's going to be hours before you con do anything about it.
If he's doing it all the time whilst ignoring you sexually then it's an issue. As long as you are his focus as a partner, then the occasional animal urge is no threat to you at all. If he's jerking off occasionally by himself then it's really nothing to worry about. Just make sure you're getting the love and attention you need, and the rest is fine.
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reader, anonymous, writes (7 July 2010): Don't worry -- trust me, guys wank ALL the time, whether they're in a relationship or not. I'm married and wank 2x a day, and then have great sex with my wife. Lasts longer, too. Guys wank as a stress releaser -- it's much more of a physical need (necessity) for men than women.... particularly for health men. Really, don't make an issue of it: If you catch him, I'm sure he would be more than happy if you joined him, and was playful with him about teh whole thing. It will bound you as a couple, with trust, etc. Don't make him feel guilty about it, or feel that he has to keep it a secret from you if you are critical. Good luck.
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A
female
reader, Elydiese +, writes (7 July 2010):
I honestly wouldnt care i just see it as normal i wouldnt want to think my boyfriend would feel angry because i wanted some "alone time"
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