A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:please bear with this and give as many opinions as possible ...how would you slowly stop talking to your ex girlfriend of one year old relationship...i dumped her cuz i am committment phobic but we care for each other a lot and are still friends....she is 17 and i am 21... we kinda have severe emotional attachment and she is kinda small hearted and is too sensitive in case of me...she is devastated after losing me(as she described her situation ) and couldnt withstand the impact of breakup...i meant the world to her and life seems directionless to her now ....we stoped talking for 2 months and got back together as friends ..but this doesnt seem to work as this friendship relationship is way too unfulfilling for her for the kind of relationship we had in the past ....i am confused people, 50 % people said be available to her and support her as a good friend cuz such caring people are hard to find and also she needs me now...she has nobody to support her ...rest claim that it will only worsen her situation and i need to make a quick exit....she is struggling to heal her heart as of now and is a dead body alive who has lost faith in everyone and doesnt want to hear about love....she said she wants me atleast as a friend and cant afford losing me completely whilst she is trying to heal herself...i messed her academics and broke off during her exams ..her results were pathetic and she is going out of town for further studies which will make her state of mind even worse....i have been encouraging and motivating her since 2 months ...we sat and sorted it out several times and i have been very supportive ....but no matter how safe it appears, in the end all the wounds are cut open and we fall into that emotional trap again ...please give your opinion ...i wont ever get such good friend in life ...she is one of a kind people ...i am confused due to mixed opinions ...thanks
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anjie  +, writes (18 June 2009):
You have to break off the friendship. For her sake and yours. The supportive friendship is not working here. It is hindering instead of healing. It has been a long enough time to try and be friends. After a year the proof is....it is not working. She has not moved on. She won't with you in her life. For her own good let her go. Very bluntly don't call her or return her calls. Hang out together etc.
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