A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Okay, so I am a student in my sophmore year in high school. Last year, during grade nine, a new teacher came to the school halfway through the year. Ever since then, I have had this thing for him. He's 27, so I would definitely be jail bait. He just makes me laugh, especially when I am upset. He's also very attractive. He jokes around with me a lot, too. I want to stop liking him because it's making me miserable. He will be my teacher for another three years. Help would be appreciated.
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female
reader, d e e p w i t h i n +, writes (24 November 2009):
 hey hun,
i totally know how you feel . ever since grade 7, i have been having teacher crushes. ( i am now 19 and a graduate, and had a HUGE teacher crush last year that did not end well...)
anyways, i know its hard because you see him everyday. and its even harder when you aren't attracted to any guys your age (me too.) all i can say is think positive and try to focus your thoughts, your attention and your time on other things. time is key, and eventually this will go away. for now, stay busy and maybe you will forget about him. you'll get through this! take care (:
A
female
reader, kitty_3  +, writes (21 November 2009):
 hmmm... then you should probably stick it out until the class ends and then avoid him like the plague. absence actually doesn't make the heart grow fonder. ;)
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (21 November 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you to the both of you. I never intended on acting on my feelings, I know the consequences of that. It's already half awkward as it is, due to the fact that he just makes it worse every day.
It just seems incredibly hard to stop liking him, as right now I'm not interested in any of the students that attend my school. That just makes it tougher.
Then, some of his actions are putting me in an even worse position. I mean, he has seen me at the bus stop once and gave me a ride home. As of late, he's been coming up to me, putting his arm around me, then saying, " You're my favorite student! " It's just getting hard, you know? I've considered changing classes, but I'm only with him for another two months.
There was a very awkward situation once where him and I were debating on something. My friend, knowing I have a slight crush on him, said, " You two act like an old, married couple. " He decided to say, " She's the hag in the relationship. " I replied with, " You wish. " Then my friend greatly pointed out that my face was turning bright red with embarrassment.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (20 November 2009): Of course you have a mild crush. Who wouldn't?
The basic problem is that if you act upon it you'll look like a total fool. And you place him in an unacceptable situation, even if he acts entirely correctly.
The classic thing to do is to pine over unrequited love for your teacher. This is so common that it's a cliche.
The essential trick is own the emotion -- not to become fixated upon your mild crush -- but simply to accept it as a fact, a part of what makes you an interesting person. Then, carrying that interesting part of you with you, continue onwards.
Teenagers -- boys and girls -- are prone to fixations. For boys this can be seen in the hours that they'll spend with cars or computers, and just how much they know about them. For girls, it is more emotional. Peer groups, emotion-laded events such as proms, drama queening, gossiping,... and crushes. The thing is to be aware of this tendency towards fixation, and to have something that works for you in countering it. You don't need anything dramatic -- usually a break in your physical routine will break the mental routine. You could sing, swim, swing, or whatever does the trick for you.
When you're a bit older you'll be able address the problem more directly. You'll have the skill to say things like "stop making me laugh, I've already got a crush and you're just making it worse" with the correct tone which sounds light and joking but he'll get the message. Probably a bit too tricky to try at your age, and school's probably too gossipy a place.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (20 November 2009): Well, at least you're not "in love" with him, so it should be much easier to do. If you're interested in any guys your own age, you should probably pay more attention to them. If its making you miserable its not worth it dear. I'm in the same boat as you, so I understand it's really hard, but trust me it's just better to get over him as quick as possible. Just do the band-aid thing. It will hurt at first, but it will go away with time.
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