A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:im 19 me and my man got busted together hes going to prison. I feel so guilty like its my fault. I tried taking some of his charges but he wouldn't let me. were in love but its so hard for me not being able to see him. im waiting for him but all I want to know is how to cope with the love of your lfe going to prison. Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (19 February 2013): Hey there, I'm in the same position as you my boyfriend is getting out on Friday after 15 months what I would say is write a lot and visit as much as you can. It's unbearably hard the first few months and to be honest it doesn't get any easier I won't lie and say it does. Unfortunately my man got his sentence 3 years after the event happened and he got his act together he finished college got a good job and stayed out of trouble and grew up but the past always catches up with you. My mainadvice would be to seriously think about this don't just stay because you love him if you stand by him make sure it's because your sure that he will stay out of trouble and he will get his life sorted, no drugs are involved, no abuse and you honestly believe there is a decent future ahead of you. Don't put yourself through more pain than you have to. I wish you all the best there are loads of forums online as well for support have a look they will give you great advice as they are all in the same position as you and they are a great support xx
A
reader, anonymous, writes (19 February 2013): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthis was my first time going to jail I don't blame him at all for me going to jail. they were drug charges but I was the one that started us doing drugs together but it wasn't just me he was doing them to. they sentenced me to probation and ive been clean ever since and its amanzing.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (19 February 2013): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionhes going away for two years any advise how to cope with that
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A
female
reader, YouWish +, writes (19 February 2013):
 Oh man, I'm going to be hard on you, but before I do, please understand that it's only from the best intentions here and that I'm trying to be kind to you.
Here goes:
WAKE THE HELL UP!!!!!!
What kind of life do you want? Being a felon will get you excluded from almost everything - a decent job, a respectable life, a good example for your future children, if you have any, and any dreams you may have.
Only a fool would try and "take" charges from a boyfriend. Only a fool would date a guy who lives a life of crime! You're 19 -- in 10 years with the life you're living now, you will be used up, bitter, devastated, wondering what happened to your life.
Instead of being completely myopic with your life, you should take the fact that you were busted and let it be an epiphany so life-shattering that you change the course of your life and live your life making the world a better place. It should open your eyes to the destructive power of this guy who has gotten you busted in the first place.
Stop thinking so shallowly, and think about who you will be at 40 years old when you no longer can afford to saunter through life, where you might have to take care of sick parents, where you are responsible for other peoples' lives, and you look back on whether or not you made the right decisions in life.
Time to change everything about yourself, and NOW.
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A
male
reader, TrancedRhythmEar  +, writes (19 February 2013):
 I think your emotions are causing you to make bad decisions. Its obvious you two are trouble when together so whats the point of being with him?
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (19 February 2013): Depends how long he's going away for and what you were busted for.
But people cope with this kind of thing all the time, you just stay in contact and wait OP, simple as that.
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