A
female
age
30-35,
*aisyscat
writes: My best friend is 4 months pregnant and her boyfriend doesn't want the kid, he wants to put it up for adoption but she wants to keep it. she's very upset and crying about it. How should I comfort her ?
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male
reader, rivi +, writes (7 February 2011):
Realistically she is never going to get support from the guy - so she has to plan for having it on her own : how exactly is that going to work in practice ?
How can she - on her own - work, pay rent, put food on table, breastfeed the kid, etc etc all at the same time ?
If she can't answer that question in a realistic way then adoption might well be best for the kid, never mind her.
If that's the conclusion better to plan for it than rush into it a coupla weeks after birth. You could help her a lot by forcing her to think these practicalities thru NOW.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (7 February 2011): She can certainly keep the baby and her boyfriend can sign away his parental rights so he's not burdened by it.
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A
female
reader, BeccaLeigh +, writes (7 February 2011):
If she doesn't want to put it up or adoption she has every right o keep it, and there's nothing he can do about it. This is a really tough situation to go through, and the most you can do is just make sure she knows that you're there do her and will help her with whatever she needs. Let her know someone cares.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (7 February 2011): Take her to tell her parents, relatives - people who will support her. Also, tell her to not let herself be pushed into any decision. Her boyfriend doesn't want the baby, but he MADE the baby, and if she wants to keep it he will have to deal with that. Just be a shoulder to cry on. Try to be on her side and be there for her with whatever she needs (within reason.) Make sure she doesn't do anything she will regret, but support her descisions even if you don't agree with them.
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