A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: So I've been dating this guy for about 4 going on 5 years now and we've been good friends before we even started dating but I've never told my parents. Most of our relationship has been long distance and my parents have never met him before (he won't be back in town for a couple of months). I don't know how I should tell them about this and I'm sure whatever happens I'll just be met with disappointment for keeping it a secret from them for such a long time. I just recently turned 18 so my parents can no longer restrict me from dating like they did when I was younger which is why I feel a bit more comfortable about telling them now. I know they wouldn't go as far as kicking me out but I know it would affect my relationship with them. They're very hot and cold about me dating yet they're fine with my younger brother dating (double standard much?) so even the thought of me dating either gets them excited or upset. Any advice about how I should go about this or should I just keep it a secret until they can officially meet him in person?Thanks everyone.
View related questions:
long distance Reply to this Question Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, dirtball +, writes (29 November 2010):
I'd just introduce him as your boyfriend. No need to discuss the tenure of your relationship with them right away. Maybe say you met online. It doesn't really matter and they don't really need to know.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (29 November 2010): Not really sure how to say this, but if you 2 had sex while you were a minor, and him an adult, check the Statutes of Limitations on statutory rape. That could come and bite u in the ass if they can pursue it. Otherwise, if safe, tell them. Your Momma will always be your best friend, and you might regret not saying anything in the long run.
...............................
A
female
reader, kirra07 +, writes (29 November 2010):
I would suggest telling them beforehand. Let them get used to the idea a bit before bringing the boy home to meet them. That way they have some time to compose themselves and the whole meeting might go a bit better.
As for telling them, tell them that it's important for you to have your parents meet and get to know your boyfriend. That you've been dating for awhile, but were afraid of what their reaction would be. That you're sorry you lied, but felt that you needed to from their reaction to the idea of you dating. That you now want to be honest and upfront about all of this.
As well, keep in mind that they might resent your bf for being the cause of you lying to them. So you might want to add that you were the one afraid to tell them, not him.
...............................
|